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Idiot's Guide to A Parent With Dementia please?

(27 Posts)
PostBellumBugsy Fri 01-Feb-13 13:44:00

So, as well as having been diagnosed with cancer my Dad seems to be rapidly dementing too. Apparently, the hormonal cancer treatment will accelerate a dementia process.

DD still lives with DM in an old (not posh) farm house in the middle of nowhere. They have both decided that they are not leaving it, unless they are carried out in boxes (great help, thanks DM&DD).

They are both late 70s. DM is finding it increasingly hard to cope with DD, as he is very forgetful (can't remember what day it is), bad tempered and rigid (gets very agitated if he doesn't eat at set times etc).

They are going to the Memory Clinic in a few weeks. What will that show? Is there any help they can get?

lainiekazan Sun 17-Mar-13 18:26:55

I agree about looking at care homes.

Mil descended from being a bit "dotty" into full blown dementia in a matter of weeks. Fil was looking after her but she became doubly incontinent and didn't know night from day. It was actually quite difficult to find a home that would take someone with advanced dementia as opposed to a bit of forgetfulness.

I snort when I read think tank proposals for "dementia friends" and suggestions about talking about the old days. Most people with dementia soon fly past this stage and it is quite harrowing for a spouse/child to deal with their nearest and dearest who no longer knows who they are and in fact has a completely different personality.

WynkenBlynkenandNod Sun 17-Mar-13 19:09:04

I need to go and look at care homes. Mum got her diagnosis last Friday, I'm just going to get through Easter then look. Dreading it but would hate to be making a decision in the middle of a crisis.

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