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Care of elderly mum

(4 Posts)
BerwickBarbara Tue 25-Oct-11 08:56:35

I'm trying to care for my mum, who is in her 90s, still in her own home (her insistence) and she has worsening dementia although it's not officially diagnosed because she refuses to talk to a doctor or social worker. I have joint power of attorney with a sibling but they are difficult to contact, moody and awkward to deal with - so bank accounts are still languishing with charges too high, many bills need sorting etc, but I can't get them to take any action. Also, I feel my mum is too vulnerable and needs extra care, but again my siblings refuse to act. Is there any advice anyone can give me? Is there anything I can do on my own, given that the legal power of attorney is a joint one?

An0therName Tue 25-Oct-11 15:15:23

Hi I would suggest contacting AgeUK for some advice as a starting point
could you get the doctor to make a home visit?
Re bills etc what do you need from you sibling - signiture?

pepperrabbit Tue 25-Oct-11 15:22:13

Do your siblings have regular contact with your mum and can see this for themselves, or do they just have your word for it and therefore may not realise how serious the situation is - or could become quite rapidly?
I agree that AgeUK is an excellent suggestion for legal advice - you would certainly need your siblings approval for any change to the enduring power of attorney.

LongWayRound Tue 25-Oct-11 15:40:44

LPAs (Lasting Power of Attorney) are administered by the Office of the Public Guardian. Their website doesn't give much information, but you could try phoning them to ask what happens if one of the joint attorneys is refusing/unable to act.
My father made out two LPAs (finance, health & welfare) earlier this year in favour of my brother and me: my brother needed to get an answer quickly during the application process and said the Office of the Public Guardian was helpful when contacted by phone.
Does the power of attorney specify that you and your sibling have to make all decisions jointly btw? Do you have a chequebook on your mother's account which needs the two of you to sign? In my father's case, my brother and I can act separately except for a very specific limited range of decisions.

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