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Why is ds never considered first?

(125 Posts)
ks Wed 13-Jul-05 12:11:44

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charliecat Wed 13-Jul-05 12:14:51

Oh no, can you not see if he can still be placed in that class?

If not my dd was in the same position nearly, 5 girls, 4 girls in one class, her put in the other. She took a while to adjust but now shes one of a new gang of 4 and is fine.

LIZS Wed 13-Jul-05 12:19:10

Oh bless, for ds. We've been through similar with ds. He is joining the school friends' dd already attends and there are at least 2 he may remember from nursery 4 years ago. We left it up to the school to decide how best to integrate him and they have placed ds and friends' dd together but the other boys are in differnet classes, largely based upon the class groups they are already in.

At this school they stream across all 3 classes for Maths and English so chances are he will still spend a large propertion of his time away from her. Perhaps your ds will be similarly mixed with his friend ? Has term finished or is there a chance for him to go and meet his new class, any summer activities going on ? It will probably work out but can understand how upset you and ds are as it takes the edge off his fresh start .

ks Wed 13-Jul-05 12:30:38

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Prettybird Wed 13-Jul-05 12:45:52

Why not ask the school - very neutrally - why is not going to be in the class he was put in on assessment day? There may be a specific reason for it.

You can explain that your son was very comfortable in the class he was in and is upset/confused he is not going to be with the boys that he met on the day (you don't even need to mention the other lad).

grumpyfrumpy Wed 13-Jul-05 12:47:28

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ks Wed 13-Jul-05 12:49:59

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spacedonkey Wed 13-Jul-05 12:53:48

This other family sound horrid

ks Wed 13-Jul-05 12:55:12

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spacedonkey Wed 13-Jul-05 13:03:06

<<<<<<<<<<<<< HUGS >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

get it off your chest here if it helps ks

mumsnet is not just about having a laugh

charliecat Wed 13-Jul-05 13:06:28

I cryed buckets in fromt of the teacher and the headmaster so dont worry

Marina Wed 13-Jul-05 13:07:00

Mumsnet is not just about having a laugh.
I have said this before, and I'll say it again. I would be thrilled to see your ds in my ds' class (ages permitting) and cannot see what anyone could find to dislike in him ks, he is a lovely little boy.
Move to SE London! She says helpfully.
PS maybe skip any salt in the spag water if you are weeping into the pan.
Lots of love XXX

ks Wed 13-Jul-05 13:07:36

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batters Wed 13-Jul-05 13:18:56

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ks Wed 13-Jul-05 13:25:12

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spacedonkey Wed 13-Jul-05 13:30:35

ks

sometimes being a parent is unbearably painful

Marina Wed 13-Jul-05 13:38:48

It certainly is ks

Cam Wed 13-Jul-05 13:50:46

kisses and hugs to you ks
maybe the school are putting your ds in the best class for him? ie with the teacher or other children they think will be best for him?

For what its worth, I don't see that the other boy's parents would have that kind of influence over such processes at the new school.

Can you tell your ds that he can see his friend at playtimes and after school?

fishfinger Wed 13-Jul-05 13:53:56

ks!
I wont hug you but this does sounds sad!
But dont cry into your spaghetti?
it will be too al dente then

I am sure you an do summat with the school
do dremeber htought that kids friendships are soooooooooo fickle adn they do ewasily change alleignaces - you dont want ds to hang all his hopes on one boy do you?

AND how have oyu managed to get me into trouble on YOUR thread?

ks Wed 13-Jul-05 13:58:12

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fishfinger Wed 13-Jul-05 15:00:07

I thnk oyu need to go out for a walk or have a nap ks

tatt Wed 13-Jul-05 15:16:49

ks mumsnet isn't just for a laugh - or why would we have the feeling depressed bit? I don't know what's happened to upset you but sounds like some st johns wort might help, just for a short time. And a good cry is essential, but do some salad with the spaghetti and cry on that.

In the long term your son will probably not even remember this. In the shorter term he will cope far better if you try and give him the impression its just one of those things and he'll be just as happy in the other class.

PollyLogos Wed 13-Jul-05 15:42:28

Kks when my ds2 went to school I was expecting him to be in a certain class with a friend of his (son of my best friend) He should have been as they divided the children alphabetically, but as one class had far more girls and the other far more boys they 'juggled' the names and ds2 ended up being put in the other class. I was very upset went to head etc etc but they wouldn't budge.

5 years later I have to say I am glad it happened- we've had better teachers all through and as a whole the class he's in is better behaviour wise and educational standard-wise.

Try and be positive so that ds doesn't pick up on your sadness, tell him he can still have playdates with X if he wants and how much fun it'll be getting to know all the other kids. Hopefully some of their mums will become good friends for you too.

fishfinger Wed 13-Jul-05 15:43:30

no I agree

think a) oyu need salad and a camapri
a nd
b) you must move on and be bright and cheery or ds will defoo get a thing about it

ks Wed 13-Jul-05 15:55:11

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