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'over sensitive' child?

(9 Posts)
wangle99 Sat 30-Apr-05 17:18:11

I'm looking for opinions really on whether I'm right to be annoyed by DD's school.

DD is in Y3, mixed year class (Y2, 3 & 4) total of 33 children.

Since the beginning of this school year she's come home saying how she's always getting pushed around at school in corridors etc and boys have been calling her names and laughing at her for various things.

I have already spoken to the teacher once who informed me 'DD is an over sensitive child and needs to toughen up'.

Things came to a point on Friday when I went to collect her and found her huddled in a heap on the corridor floor sobbing (she was trying to retrieve her book bag) whilst boys pushed and practically trod on her.

Again teacher passed it off and said about her being sensitive.

I am so annoyed by their attitude, perhaps DD is over sensitive but that is the way she is and nothing is going to change it. We are actually changing her school (you may have seen other post about her getting a music scholarship), new school would not tolerate such behaviour and has such smaller class sizes.

Am I wrong? Should DD 'toughen up' and get used to this? I am writing a letter to the school stating the reasons we are removing her - should I list this as one of them or is it just not worth it?

Sorry this was a bit long.

Look forward to reading your replies.


Twiglett Sat 30-Apr-05 18:02:03

that's bullying and they should have protocols in place. I would discuss it with the teacher again and if no joy talk to the head

personally I think some children can be over-sensitive and do need a little 'toughening up' but not and never through allowing their peers to physically or mentally bully them

Twiglett Sat 30-Apr-05 18:02:26

(but through building their self-esteem and self-confidence through things like music )

Gobbledigook Sat 30-Apr-05 18:05:38

I think that's outrageous - all children are different and not all will be extrovert, confident and outgoing or 'tough' - that's just the way it is and all children should be respected and treated kindly regardless of their personality.

Twiglett is right - that behaviour is nothing but bullying and I'd be absolutely livid. I certainly wouldn't let it go and I'd be straight to the head on Tuesday morning if I were you.

geranium Sun 01-May-05 19:21:11

Outrageous behaviour - you are right to be annoyed. Also, imho teacher shouldn't use phrase like "toughen up". It should be phrased in more positive terms such as "building self-esteem" etc. I know that sounds a bit politically correct but I think using words like "toughen up" can give an excuse for letting some pretty unacceptable treatment by others go by without comment. Your poor child. Thank goodness she is moving school.

coppertop Sun 01-May-05 19:24:55

IMO it's bullying. No wonder you are annoyed. I would be tempted to include this in a letter to the Head (cc'ing it to the governors) and suggest that their bullying policy needs to be updated and clarified.

berolina Sun 01-May-05 19:25:44

When I was at school I got sick of hearing 'over sensitive', used about me. OK, so I did take everything very much to heart, but how everything from name-calling to being spat on and having chewing gum stuck in my hair was supposed to 'help' me by 'toughening me up', I don't know. We don't expect adults to have to put up with being called names and shoved around, so why do we routinely expect it of children? I'd hoped schools/teachers were a bit more enlightened now .

firestorm Mon 02-May-05 15:19:53

im so angry how dare the teacher take this attitude. i would definitely include this in your letter as a reason for removing her. their anti bullying policy (or lack of) needs a good shake up.
the best of luck to your dd in her new school.

wangle99 Mon 02-May-05 17:42:53

Thank you. I was beginning to think it was me being 'over sensitive' lol.

Having been chatting with DH last night he informed me (why he couldn't have said this earlier!) that he was exactly the same in school and also classed as 'over sensitive'.

I knew things had come to a head last Friday when DD actually said she didn't want to go to school - this has never happened before. Her reasoning? Because she was frightened was she going to get hurt.

Will definately include it in my letter to the Headmistress when I tell them she is leaving, the new school have put her down for a September start but am desperate to get her in sooner!

Thanks for your comments.


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