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what you you say !!sex education for 8 year old with questions !!

(18 Posts)
debzmb62 Mon 12-Jan-09 18:05:45

my son is just 8 years old and i'm sort of stuck he's ask for info of how babies are really made !!?? i have 5 older children and can,t remember at what age they ask about it what and how would you explain and would you tell the whole truth and go into detail ?

cory Mon 12-Jan-09 18:51:15

Tell as much of the truth as he seems interested in. Go into whatever detail he seems to want or need to know. I recently had to disabuse my ds of the notion that men make babies by peeing into women. I'd rather he knew the truth than thought that.

OneLieIn Mon 12-Jan-09 18:54:39

Oh yuk Cory!

Does anyone know of a good book or guide to help? I got asked by DD (8) how the seed gets into the woman - I need to answer.

ForeverOptimistic Mon 12-Jan-09 18:56:42

At 8 I think I would tell him everything.

Ds started asking him when he was 4 and I told him that the man has seeds that come out of his willy and go into the woman and mix with her eggs which are inside her tummy, I didn't actually go into the logistics of how they got inside. He then started asking how they got inside and I said the man puts them inside but didn't expand any further.

When I was 8 I was starting to hear all sorts of rubbish from older children at school. You don't want your ds to hear that. Get a book and look through it together.

ForeverOptimistic Mon 12-Jan-09 18:57:31

Try the library. I can't remember the names of the books that we looked at.

neversaydie Mon 12-Jan-09 19:09:50

Try What's Happening to Me?: Boy. Reasonably age appropriate for an under-10, and so far as I can tell, accurate. A friend with a slightly older son than mine recommended it as one that her boy found helpful. So far my 9-year-old hasn't come up with anything his agriculturally-trained Ma cannot cope with off the cuff, but I am sure he will, and I have a copy in reserve for when he does.

debzmb62 Tue 13-Jan-09 00:44:24

thank's i,ve ordered the book worth a look i have 2 older sons one 28 and one 16 can't remember them asking this at this earlie age
he know's about condoms and i've told him little things like its when 2 grown ups love each other etc but its difficult to say the truth
he's asked what his testicules were so i sort of told him and he know mummy has eggs inside her but its the middle bit i just don't know how to explain

gigglewitch Tue 13-Jan-09 00:53:16

funny one debz - have had a similar convo with my 8yo (b/day was last week) ds tonight too
have told him more tonight than before, basically answered everything that he asked in a straight and honest way.
Think it was ok...

willali Tue 13-Jan-09 10:40:40

Agree best policy is total honesty without going into gory details etc ie this goes in there and this comes out and that happens...Also at this age I think it is good to put it in the context of a loving relationship, and also to make the point that babies are not made every time you do it! I have just started talking to my 8 year old girl about periods as well as I think it will be more awkward later, and stats show girls are starting ever younger these days!

JLo2 Tue 13-Jan-09 16:45:02

We've got an Usborne book called 'Understanding the Facts of Life'. Keep it handy for when I can't find the right words for answering questions!

cheltmum Sun 18-Jan-09 14:55:44

I got a book called "Where Willy Went" for my son when he started asking quite detailed questions around 7 or 8. It's a funny book, with great cartoon-style drawings, and I'd say had the appropriate level of information for that age.

Elk Thu 22-Jan-09 10:50:53

I like the book 'Where did I come from?'. I read it myself aged about 6. It is easy to understand and has lovely pictures.

pake Tue 14-Jul-09 21:22:04

Cheers for all the info, I have an 8 year old boy so have just bought Whats happening to me for boys and where willy went. Hope they will help as want him to be informed without embarrasing him or me!!

ABetaDad Tue 14-Jul-09 21:44:36

This is a really intersting thread and really useful answers.

We are just hitting this phase. DS1 is oblivious but DS2 asked very specifically the other day about HOW does a baby get out of Mummy. I told him there is a hole between Mummy's legs that you came out of. I also said all girls and women have a hole but did not name it. DW went mad with me for telling him but I have decided they need to know and not just about the biology but all about relationships.

I suspect this is just the first question of a long series and the next question will be HOW does he baby get in Mummy.

Those are good book references. I think I might go and get one very soon.

Informer2 Fri 28-Aug-09 22:07:38

Message withdrawn

scroobiuspirate Sat 29-Aug-09 18:18:58

oh god he's here aswell.

DON@T FEED HIM

mathanxiety Sun 30-Aug-09 01:38:53

Just make sure you read any books you get for your DS before you give them to him. I think it's important to name the body parts accurately, btw -- Abetadad, why not call it a vagina?

I found I had to order quite a few books and read them all before selecting which ones were age-appropriate for my DS. Girls' informational books likewise. I found one that was simple, clear and useful for younger girls in the American Girl series, called "The Care and Keeping of You". I wish they had one for boys along the same lines. For older girls, "The Period Book" covered a lot of ground, but I wouldn't give it to anyone younger than twelve or thirteen.

JoeyF Mon 31-Aug-09 18:59:20

Try the following

the channel 4 Sex education site

programme 1
programme 2
programme 2b

This is worth going through as well

Big list of sexaul health, youth and sexaul health services

You also need to pre-empt playground nonsense myths your kids may pick out by getting in there first being open making sure he knows he can discuss anything with you or another male (dad, brother, family friend who can pull girls etc)

So he does not pick up nonsense like

Sperm dies in air

Pulling out can prevent pregnancy (This belief is responsible for most teen pregancies as schools dont teach about precum sperm leaked from the penis ALL THE TIME ITS ERECT... 1,000,000 per drop before ejeculation),

Any nonsense about safe times of the monh, cant get pregant first time, virgins cant have stds (many are blood transmitted ie fights, sport, first Aid or can enter the eyes)

etc

You also need to cover things like is normal for boys and girls to masterbate so he does not think he is a perverted freak likewise that males tend to get facinated with breats and thats simply part of human attraction likewise females end to prefer muscells of a guy.

(that way you dont end up with a kid who is a basket case needing years of councelling)

Much of Europe where they have a tiny teen pregancy rate compared to the uk... the worst in the UK so clearly most in the UK are wrong in saying you should wait and teach as little as possible) starts sex and relationship education aged around 4 and 5 and its part of the curriculum ill late teens so we are talking hundreds of hours of lessons.

It clearly works

Supporting statistical data 1

supporting statistical data 2

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