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How will it affect ds if he comes to the school I teach at?

(14 Posts)
rachels103 Wed 08-Oct-08 21:33:02

I teach at a v. nice village primary school. If ds came to my school (he's nearly 3 so we're talking 2010) I'd feel pretty happy about the experience and education that he would receive. However, the village is a bit cliquey and I'm not sure how other parents would react, and how I would cope with being a parent and a teacher.

Up to now I've always been anti working at the same school that dc attend, because it might cause them probs with friends and make them feel like mum's always watching. Also worry for myself a bit, that I might be a bit too interested in what he's doing (ie cross parent/teacher boundary without meaning to)

Trouble is, we live in a town about 6 miles away, catchment schools aren't great and it crosses a county boundary which means we wouldn't share all the same holidays.

Anyone got any experience / words of wisdom about this? Seems a bit early to think about it but if we are going to apply to my school I'd want to start him in the local pre school rather than one in our town, and I need to sort that out soonish.

Orinoco Wed 08-Oct-08 21:36:08

Message withdrawn

Hulababy Wed 08-Oct-08 21:36:58

I have known a few teachers who have had their on child at the school they work in, and in pretty much every case there have been no problems.

As a parent it wouldn't bother me if a teacher's child was at the school

I help ut as a voluntary classroom assistant 2-3 days a week in DD's pretty small school, a lot of the time in DD's class too. It is fine. The parents certainly don't think it is a problem. And DD desn't either and it hasn't affected her friendships.

minorbirdOnElmstreet Wed 08-Oct-08 21:40:03

My DD is going to her granny's school next year. (My mum is a reception teacher there) But DD would be going there anyway, as it's a lovely school and I went there. I'll be lurking on this thread though to see what other people think about it! Best of luck whatever you decide! smile

3xyummymummy Wed 08-Oct-08 21:45:36

I'm a primary school teacher and at the school I worked at a few of the teachers had their children in the school. It wasn't a village school so things were a bit different but this is what they seemed to find: One of them thought it was fine having her children at the same school and sent her younger children (over 10 years between her eldest and next two) to the same school, so having the first there didn't put her off. Another found it really good and easy when her child first moved to the school( I taught her son for the first year) but she found it more difficult the following year due to the teacher and her child not seeing eye to eye. I had no problem teaching a child of a teacher, but was more aware of what I said in front of the teacher and made sure she only heard about her child if it was to hear something that I would report to a parent who wasn't in the school. My husband was taught in a school that his mum taught in and said it was fine. In a small village school you need to also think about what parents will think if you don't send your child there, will they think it's a reflection on what you think of the school/children? It's definitely not a straight forward one, but I'm sure you will make the right decision for you as a family.

robinpud Wed 08-Oct-08 21:46:37

I am hugely against the whole idea. I think children need space to be their own person and find their own way without a parent constantly circling. What would you talk about at tea time?

In the event of you having to deal with dc at playtime for instance, would you be a mum or a teacher first? You might be able to deal with that better than I could. I once had my dd at my school when hers was on INSET and something happened which made me realise that in any situation involving dd, I would always be her mother first and a teacher second, and that would make me less of a teacher to the other kids, which isn't fair. The strength of my emotions surprised me and I would never have wanted to have to subdue those feeling in order to do my job.

Having the children in a nearby school has been beneficial in lots of ways and they have friends locally and are part of the community.

footballsgalore Wed 08-Oct-08 21:51:49

My DS came to the school I taught 3 days a week at (jobshare). I too was very wary but the thought of putting him into yet more childcare and the fact that the school was good swayed my decision. For the most part it was lovely. No problems with parents and really nice to have him there before and after school etc. Also lovely to be very involved in his education. However, it is hard to teach your own child, I was much harder on him than any of the others as I didn't want to be seen to be favouring him. Also if your DS is well behaved it's fine but it could be embarressing(sp?!) hearing about any naughty deeds in the staffroom!!!
I think the main thing to consider is, will you be staying at the school for his entire primary education? If you decide to leave, it could mean moving him too. Difficult if he is happy and you're not! Sorry, i seem to have gone on a bit! Hope it helps. grin

Reallytired Wed 08-Oct-08 21:55:59

Would it be an option for you to change job?

Yorky Wed 08-Oct-08 22:12:29

My mum teaches in my old high school - when I started she was only 3days a week there, byt the time my youngest brother left she was an assistant head of year. I know its different in high school but it never hurt us, and she wasn't the only parent on the staff either. If anything its a vote of confidence for the school because you see so much more than what they show on parents evenings.
I knew some of my primary school teachers socially - as in they were friends of my parents through church etc and it never bothered me that at weekends they were Auntie x, and on Monday morning Miss x.
Having said that as a Brownie Guider I've always said that if I have a daughter I'll put her in someone else's pack!

rachels103 Thu 09-Oct-08 12:33:11

Aargh!
Thanks for all your advice, but I'm no nearer a decision as I agree with all of you! half of me is against for all the reasons you describe robinpud, but there are so many positives too. Good point about moving him if I do too - hadn't thought of that.

Don't really want to change schools Reallytired, although it might come to that.

Please keep posting me your opinions...even if it is making me more and more baffled smile

Sycamoretree Thu 09-Oct-08 13:12:52

My dad was the headteacher of the school in the town, my mum was a teacher at the school in the village, so I was between a rock and a hard place.

I actually spent two years at one, and two years at another. It never really caused me any problems - probably because I didn't know any different. Tbh, it wasn't the kids that were the problem, so much as the adults. I remember three specific indicents:

One where my mother saw what I had ordered from the cafeteria and made her disapproval very publicly known. She shouldn't have done, because other kids were eating similar and she wouldn't have seen it as her place to comment. I was so embarrassed.

Another, it was my teacher who infuriated me. A boy threw and iceball in my ear, which had a perforated eardrum from a school swim collision. I cried and told the teacher. I was sobbing - he said "Just because your dad's the headmaster doesn't mean you can just go telling tales on everyone.....". I wanted to punch him.

Finally, my mum decided to withdraw me from taking part in a fundraising campaign because my parents had read and article about the slightly muddy allocation of funds for that charity. I told my best friend why I wasn't taking part. Her mum approached the school about it (obviously knowing my mum was a teacher) and it was ME that got hauled up in the head teachers office for it.

So, you see, you have nothing to fear from the kids. It's your own behaviour and that of your colleagues that you'd had to keep a closer eye on IMO.

But I was happy at both schools, and no one ever teased me. In fact, my dad was a bit of a hero because he ran the football team, the school band etc and the kids generally loved him.

twinsetandpearls Thu 09-Oct-08 19:44:31

I will be moving in a few months so that I can get my dd into the correct middle/ primary school so she can go to school where I teach.

I have taught with teachers who have sent theior kids to the same school and never seen anything negative.

There was one dd who was a nightmare but I think she would have been the same whereever she went and I suspect she got the feew GCSEs she did because her mum was on the case.

However I am sending my dd to the school because it is a fantastic school rather than because I teach there.

But it will allow me the oppurtunity to keep an eye on her.

rachels103 Thu 09-Oct-08 20:48:55

twinset...it's the 'keeping an eye on' aspect that I'm worried about, as that's not why I'm considering it at all. I don't want to be tempted to snoop too much, and quite honestly don't want to know every time he's told off / praised etc...

My only reason is that it would be better in terms of holidays, and the school is lovely - much better than the options we have closer to home. Reception in particular is lovely and the teacher is fabulous. Actually it's mainly for reception that I want him to go there.

twinsetandpearls Thu 09-Oct-08 23:54:49

My initial consideration is sending her to a fabulous school which offers exactly what I want for dd.

It would not bother me about knowing her every misdemeanor, but I am a control freak

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