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Ds (5) wants violin lessons but I am terrified of music teachers. What do I do?

(20 Posts)
FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sat 04-Oct-08 09:50:14

You know how some people are scared of the dentist? Well I am that scared of music teachers.

i always kind of hoped my kids wouldn't want music lessons because I didn't want to have to interact with the teacher. blush

and fgs music at 5 is just poncey, so i am also a bit blush

Ds is 5, and is desperate to learn. I have been messing about on my own violin of late. I learnt until I was about 10 (did grade 5 and then was allowed to give up), but I am trying to get myself into it again. I'd like to get a teacher but might need some form of relaxation therapy first wink. seriously i had a HORRIBLE teacher <shudder>. I once had to sit under the table for a 30 minute group lesson because my violin kept going untuned and i couldn't tune it. I was 5, btw.

Realistically, Suzuki seems like a good option for ds as he is very auditory. (eg he has memorised the first 3 books of little house on the prairie hmm).

But that requires a LOT of parental involvement. I am really worried that I am going to break down into a quivering 8 year old at his first lesson. And if she is in any way a bit off with me I might cry. (this is NOT like me. oh dear)

Ok so I have a number here for a suzuki teacher. Should I use it? What if she asks me a question?

If I explain that I have a phobia of violin teachers she is going to think I am a bit odd, isn't she?

he is homschooled so not chance of it in school.

please say nice things.

or i could get dp to make the first phone call, what do you think? but i will have to go to the lessons, i expect, since i know more about it.

oh dear oh dear

(disclaimer: I am not usually like this. I can make all sorts of calls about all sorts of things.)

SaintRiven Sat 04-Oct-08 09:52:30

I didn't lik the suzuki method myself but thst just me.
Can the teacher come to the house? On your own territory you might feel braver. You're the employer, you are in charge. Hold that in your head.

FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sat 04-Oct-08 09:53:54

<nods sagely>

i will ask her, but i don't think she will cos its quite a long way

but ah no then i would have to clear enough floor space for her to stand in, wouldn't I?


AbbeyA Sat 04-Oct-08 09:55:00

I was going to say do it through school which is a very easy options and then scrolled down and found you can't!
Has he got grandparents who could get involved and go with him? A friend who wants to take a DC and would take them both?

SaintRiven Sat 04-Oct-08 09:56:27

no, violins and the person don't take up that much room.
ds1's paino teacher has to climb over all the mess and kick it out of the way wink

FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sat 04-Oct-08 10:09:42

good thought abbey, my mum would love to but sadly is 200 miles away

if he were a little older I might consider taking him to London for her to take on to a lesson

though my god that would be £50 a lesson shock

lol @ riven

AbbeyA Sat 04-Oct-08 10:24:35

I thought you might have a problem with geography. I should try and think of anyone you know that could be pressed into service!
For example if you knew an older lady with time on her hands she might like to get involved. Have you thought of paying a teenager to take him? If you had a 6th form student living nearby they might like a bit of pocket money for an easy task.

onwardandupward Sat 04-Oct-08 10:35:13

5 is awfully early. I'd be looking for someone who would approach the whole thing through fun fun fun rather than formal lessons and expecting practice. Progress with sheet music is so slow before people are fluent readers.

No experience of Suzuki.

Oh, and as someone who has done her bit of instrumental teaching at various points in her life: GRAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR [fillyjonk jumps a mile in terror]

FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sat 04-Oct-08 14:31:33

no have phoned

she was lovely

i feel like an eegit

5 is stupidly young I think. We are going to take him along to a lesson and see if it is STILL what he wants and if so <shrug>

AbbeyA Sat 04-Oct-08 14:36:03

Well done-I bet you love it! It sounds as if anything has to be better than your experience!

pointydog Sat 04-Oct-08 14:51:35

my nephew started violin at 5 and he is just wonderful now (18).

Why not phone up an dpretend you are talking to someone who runs a music shop rather than a teacher?

FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sat 04-Oct-08 14:58:35

grin at pointy

I actually pretended (in my head) that i was phonong for a friend

But she was lovely

not like MY teacher at all

she didn't seem to have a smoker's cough for one thing...

pointydog Sat 04-Oct-08 15:04:58

well, hopefully that's an end to your irrational fear

tootyflooty Sat 04-Oct-08 15:23:59

I am a flute teacher and not at all scarey, (although some of my pupils parents are !!!)Have you tried your local council, Not sure where you are but in Berkshire there is Maestros music trust that sends teachers into schools for instrumental lessons, or you can have lessons at the music centre on Saturdays, at five they offer kinderfiddle, in a small group lesson, I know of several older children who started like this and are stiil playing and working through the grades, when they are older and have more experience there are all sorts of orchestras and groups they can join.Your own education authority may have something like that.If not your local music shop may have a list of local private teachers.
I think its great if they have an interest in music, if they stick with it they will always have a hobby as an adult to return to, and who knows could end up building a career on it.I have never met a person who regrets learning an instrument, but plenty who wish they had.

Milliways Sat 04-Oct-08 15:25:26

Go into your local music shops as they normally have lists of teachers. You can then phone them up & see who sounds less scary??

We have a young musicians trust near here and they do Kinderfiddle group classes on Saturday mornings which are fun.

Milliways Sat 04-Oct-08 15:26:02

Snap TootyFruity - forgot it is now called Maestros!!

MollieO Sat 04-Oct-08 21:02:52

We've been going to Berkshire Maestros since my ds was 2.5 and to a Kodaly music class before that from when he was 3 mths. He is now 4 and just started piano lessons at school.

I thought he was a bit young but the piano teacher does some kind of assessment to see if they can be taught (no idea what!) and apparently he is very keen and does very well in his lessons. I've been amazed at the quantity of homework he gets each week but he does it with enthusiasm.

No idea what his piano teacher is like but his BM teacher is lovely.

musicposy Sun 05-Oct-08 19:55:31

Hi there! Don't be scared. Go along to the lesson and make sure you like the teacher. Remember that he who pays the piper calls the tune! If you don't like a teacher, move on and find another. Not all music teachers are scary, or at least I hope not because I am a piano teacher grin. I think I am lovely (I hope so!), I understand when pupils have more pressing things to do than practice all day and I don't get cross and I don't have a smokers cough. Some of my pupils have been with me 10 years and are really like friends by the time they go off to university. So it doesn't have to be like you remember!
Oh, and I home educate my two girls, too, and they also go to a lovely singing teacher in the day who is very nice and complimentary about them being home educated. I also have another piano teacher friend who home educated her son. So just find someone who suits you and don't stick with anyone who doesn't.
At 5, it should be fun. In fact I think that even for my Grade 8 pupils, it should still be fun, just harder fun, maybe wink.
For the record, when I was 11 I had a really, really scary violin teacher too. I begged my mum to let me give up and after a year of me crying over the lessons, she did. But then, when I was 16, a new violin teacher started at my school, I tried lessons with her and loved it. So it really is down to finding the right person. If your child is happy and you're not scared to speak to them, you've found them ! Good luck.

FILLYJONKhasayarnshopASBO Sun 05-Oct-08 20:08:25

thanks for all your messages. posy you sound lovely, and not at all as though you would have a smoker's cough.

Actually I am all set up now and enthused. Actually I am seriously considering getting viola lessons for me.

I am very envy at kodaly, we don't have kodaly in these parts, god no. ONE suzuki teacher, a 30 minute drive away hmm

OORMI Fri 09-Sep-11 10:28:01


I am very new to UK. Could anyone suggest a good violin teacher nearabout South Oxhey. My DD is going to be giving grade5.

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