DD1 has decided she wants to go to an all girls school

[NigellaTheOriginal]

because she hates boys unless they're more than 15 and wants to concentrate and work hard. (her words!!)
so just done some working out and will need about £25,000+ to send her to either of the independent girls schools within spitting distance.
That is more than I get paid every year. she's not brilliant enough for scholorships and after telling my mother, she hasn't offered.
so unless I win the lottery this week DD will just have to get on with it at current school and when se is in therapy she can blame it all on me.

[bealcain]

i wouldn't worry. girls schools aren't all they're cracked up to be. mine was a grammar school and i hated the fact that there were no boys of any age to help even out hormones.

my dd will never set foot in an all girls school.....

i'm sure she'll understand when you explain about costs

[NigellaTheOriginal]

yes she understands and its just a whim but ......
what if she'd be happier there? will never know but ...
just but...

[KazzaL]

I went to an all girls school and it took me ages to have a normal relationship with a boy even as a friend, so although the research shows that girls do perform better in single sex schools (I belive, if I remember correctly from when I did my teacher training), but emotionally they are stunted (not a good choice of word - sorry) Supposed my school had a higher pregnancy rate than the mixed schools nearby.

If they exsited I would send my kids to a mixed school with single sex lessions.

[bealcain]

kazza - my school too has produced more slappers for want of a better word. that don;'t know how to effectively communicate with boys/men except in a sexual way.

[NigellaTheOriginal]

agree that mixed probably makes for a more socially/emotionally normal person and of cours4e against all my good sound socialist values but she wants it. (although she's not going to get it.) will she hate me forever (again)?

[bealcain]

no she won;t hate you. she'll hate whatever school you send her to as she's a teenager!

[KazzaL]

Exactly beancain - when we all went to sixthform college, there was lots of mised groups (from the 2 mixed high schools in our town) and then a group of geeky boys (from the all boys school) and then us all dolled-up as if we were going out on a saturday night and eyeying up all the boys as if they were aliens.

It's not a naturdal environment - however as long as your child does lots of mixed activities outside school, it shouldn't be too much of a problem - i went to guides & ballet, which wasn't very helpful on that front!

[KazzaL]

i wanted to go the girls school, although my mum was quite keen on me going to a mixed school, she gave in as all my friends were going to and it was across the road

I'm a guide leader now and all our girls hate boys until they get to about 12/13 - its normal

[branflake81]

I went to an all girls school and was tremendously shy around boys until the age of about 25 as a result. It wasn't a bad place and was very good academically but I do think that socially it's not ideal.

[Bink]

I was at an all-girls school which merged with its brother school when I was 12/13 - the change was a bit frightening at that age, but we all seemed to adapt quickly and, having gone through such a precise experiment, I can say that co-ed was ultimately a MUCH MUCH better experience for everyone.

That said - my own dd is now at an all-girls primary school (having previously been at a co-ed one) and utterly in her element.

But secondary my preference would definitely be for co-ed. We will see what she thinks ...

[Cammelia]

I presume you mean £25,000 per year Nigella?

If so that means boarding then.

day school would be a lot cheaper

[pointydog]

You should have laughed very loudly when she told you she wanted to go to girls school and left it at that.

Don't know why you faffed about looking up costs and speaking to your mum.

[doiwant3]

I loved my school - all girls and made fantastic friends there. I would love my daughter to go there, but it's far too expensive, £4,000 a term. But you know what, I think she will be fine and probably better not to spend all her time mixing with girls who have so much money than her!
But I don't agree that there is something wrong with girls' schools.

[NorkyButNice]

I went to an all-girls school and am another one who had real problems relating to boys as "just friends" - university was a real shocker!

[Cammelia]

doiwant3, I recently looked around 2 all-girls schools (1 boarding, 1 day/boarding mix) and I found the atmosphere to be unnaturally intense in a very off-putting way.

Luckily dd is quite firm that she wants to got o co-ed

[CuckooClockWorkOrange]

Your socialist values Nigella?!?!?! Excuse me while I hold my sides. They are aching from laughing too much.

[elevator]

I taught at a girls' school some years ago. There were about four male staff and twenty five women. The men were treated pretty appallingly by the girls (sexually explicit comments in the girls' loos etc) and stupid behaviour in the classrooms. Mind you, the stupid behaviour in the classrooms extended to women teachers too.

A few years later we merged with the local boys' school and after a pretty chaotic period of adjustment (which was really rooted in promises made by the LEA and was little to do with the staff or pupils), the whole thing settled down and from that moment on the girls behaved in a much more mature manner. It was as though the girls were embarrassed about being stupid in front of the boys - a sort of self regulating mechanism.

[Spagblog]

I loved my all girls school...

However I could never get a boy of my age to show any interest in me and shacked up with a man 10 years older than me (now my husband) when I turned 18!

[SqueakyPop]

A day school is more like £12000 pa.

I teach in a girls' school and it is such a fab atmosphere to work in. And it is clean.

[laweaselmys]

I liked my all girls school! But there is a slight tendency for pupils to deviate in extremes between very slutty and very shy.

I'm fine though, and I have a really strong group of friends that I met there who I never once fell out with over a boy. 'tis quite nice really. Buuut, I did have a very close male friend out of school so I think I was a bit more used to the idea of boys as friends when I left.

I'm sure she'll be happy wherever she ends up, it's not worth worrying about!

[booge]

I went to an all girls school from 11-13, it was a vipers nest. When I left and went co-ed I couldn't believe how much more easy going the girls were.

[AbbeyA]

I went to both. I much preferred the mixed. They were sex mad in the all girls!!

[AbbeyA]

I agree booge, in our area there is a choice. Protective parents choose the all girls for their daughters (it does very well in league tables), little do they know that it is a viper's nest for those that don't fit the norm!

[Judy1234]

The usual day school fees are £10k a year even in this bit of London so if it's £25k you live near a very expensive one presumably boarding school. There are state single sex schools in our area too although we chose to pay as I was lucky enough to be well paid.

[Feenie]

I went to both - completely agree with the vipers' nest comment, multiply the bitchness by a million and you won't be close.