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getting my son to stay at nursey on his own

(5 Posts)
skittles Tue 08-Feb-05 10:37:13

my son started nursery 4 weeks ago and everytime i go to leave he gets really upset.he has started making himself sick now.i have had to stop taking him for the time being but am going to try again after half term.any suggestions on how to overcome this.

bundle Tue 08-Feb-05 10:50:07

how old is he? what sort of settling period did you have and how was it done?

Laylasmum Tue 08-Feb-05 10:52:20

Skittles i think most kids are like this at frist my dd certainly was. all you can do is reassure him that you will return ans talk about what you will do while he's there( make it sound really boring though). He will eventually settle, by not sending him though you are telling him that if he makes a big fuss he doesn't have to go but he does, so stick with it he will settle in time. the staff will be well used to dealing with this. I might sound harsh but sometimes i think you have to be cruel to be kind!!( Its worse for you than it is for him anyway!!)

NotQuiteCockney Tue 08-Feb-05 11:16:00

I'd talk to the staff about it. If you go, does he stay unhappy, or does he settle down? How is he when you go to get him?

When we were going to the co-op nursery, I often found that parents hanging about (rather than saying "bye!" briskly and cheerfully) made things worse.

DS1 is always happy to go into any sort of group situation, so I've not got experience with this as a parent ... but the few times he's had a whinge, "I don't want to go to school.", I often say "ooh, good, I can go instead, you can go do boring errands for me, and I'll go play with Mrs X, and run about with Y and Z" ... he changes his mind pretty quickly!

pixel Tue 08-Feb-05 13:09:25

Dd went through a phase of this. I used to stay for a few minutes showing great interest in some lovely activity, then I'd sigh and say "oh well, I supposed I'd better go and buy some bread/milk (something boring), do you want me to bring you back some chocolate buttons?" Then I'd disappear while she was still thinking about sweets! Also it was a subtle way of letting her know I was definately coming back. She was fine after a couple of weeks and never looked back.

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