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Advice needed re my daughter in yr 3, please!!

(15 Posts)
video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:06:38

I would really appreciate some advice please as have no idea what to do!! Basically my daughter has always been on the table for the children who need the most help with their work. I completely agree with this as there are certain areas that she really struggles with. The problem is that all the other children on her table have a lot of behavioural issues. My daughter really loves school and wants to work but the TA on her table spends most of her time just trying to stop the others misbehaving so cannot really work with my daughter to explain the work. I am just getting so worried as year after year it's the same and I just don't know what to do!

Beetroot Sun 20-Jul-08 17:11:46

have you spoken to the school about this

video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:23:27

I have spoken to them but their answer is that they group children according to ability. I do agree with that and have no problems accepting that my daughter is working at that level but I just want her to be able to work and get some help from the TA . I just don't know whether I should just accept this or if there is anything else I could do?

Beetroot Sun 20-Jul-08 17:26:29

Perhaps you need to have a rather more serious talk with them - once she goes into her new class in Septmeber - ask them to try moving her and see how she copes, although she may find she gets even less help from the TA. But perhaps more help from the other more able children?

needaholiday Sun 20-Jul-08 17:29:59

I don't know the answer but you can't just accept this. It isnt fair for your daughter to effectively be held back by not being helped in the way she should be. She has as much right to proper help as any child with behavioural issues. Sorry to be blunt but their problems are not yours or your daughters. I think the way she's being treated is disgusting and needs to be nipped in the bud now before it drags on into secondary school or she loses the will to bother learning. Hopefully someone will be about with some advice but I just wanted to offer an opinion.

needaholiday Sun 20-Jul-08 17:30:26

sorry cross post blush

smartiejake Sun 20-Jul-08 17:34:43

I think your dd is being treated terribly unfairly. The main responsibility for discipline rests firmly with the class teacher. Surely she must know about the bad behaviour of these other children and she should be doing more to stop it.

A good class teacher should work with all groups throughout the week letting the TA work with other groups.

It's a tricky time of year to be discussing this as the summer hols are about to start

As soon as the new school year starts I would be straight in there to voice your concerns with the new class teacher. If she is made aware of these issues right at the beginning of the year she will hopefully nip any bad behaviour of dcs when with the TA in the bud.

I agree that to let your dd work with a slightly higher ability group may well be the answer. Children can learn alot from each other and it can actually cement learning for those children in the helper role so benefits both sides.

Does your dd have an IEP?

video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:39:02

Thank you both very much! I will definitely see how she settles in her new class and then have another talk with them. I just wanted to hear what others would do as I just don't want the school thinking that my issue is that she is on the table for children who need most help but just felt that I am really letting her down by doing nothing. Thanks for your advice.

video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:43:10

She has a statement but it is actually for medical reasons. The TA is actually employed as a 1-1 for her so sits on the table with her but then spends most of the time trying to convince the others to do their work!

wheresthehamster Sun 20-Jul-08 17:44:28

But also make sure you have the facts correct.

Do you know (apart from what your DD says) that this is actually happening? And how often? Maybe the TA does start her off with the work but expects a little independence and your DD isn't confident enough to work on her own (I see this a lot).

There's no reason why, once she's had the objective explained to her, that she couldn't sit on another table and get on, although of course that would require a degree of working on her own.

Agree that a good teacher will be rotating the groups, that's why I queried how often this was happening. Maybe the TA finds it difficult to control the other children when it's her turn, sometimes TAs are not allowed to use the same consequences as teachers do.

wheresthehamster Sun 20-Jul-08 17:46:58

Just seen your last post!!

If this is happening during your allocated 1-1 time then it is definitely not acceptable. The other children's behaviour should not be the responsibility of your TA

video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:50:25

I have to be in the classroom quite a lot so have seen it myself. Agree that my dd does have to be able to work on her own but have definitely seen lessons where the TA has not been able to explain the work for ages because of the other children. Occasionally they put the children into mixed ability groups and the difference is amazing as the TA can actually get on and help the children with their work.

smartiejake Sun 20-Jul-08 17:54:18

That is terrible. If there are other significant learning needs in the class then they should have a separate TA to deal with them. The funding for your dds TA should be for her as it is presumably listed on her statement.

Never mind the teacher the head is who I would be talking to- he is the one who holds the purse strings.

video Sun 20-Jul-08 17:56:25

Thank you all so much! Really helps to get some advice as was starting to get really stressed about it all so thank you!

VaginaShmergina Sun 20-Jul-08 18:20:39

Agree with what the others have said. Your daughter is the one who is statemented, it is not an easy process and she has it for a reason.

Are the others also statemented or just badly behaved?

Not really satisfactory if either really. She is being held back and it is not fair.

Annoys the hell out of me these so called "naughty kids". Three years running my DD has had a separate child that is so disruptive and violent that when they kick off the whole class has to leave until they have calmed down !! Does not sound like much logic to me.

If you have not already broken up I would go to the Head and express your concerns now and say you are sure things will improve from the beginning of next year hmm

Its a shame that "He who shouts the loudest" thingy works, but it does.

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