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ds let out of school before I arrived - he's 4!

12 replies

BooMama · 15/09/2004 16:27

This is ds's 2nd week of school - he's in reception, part time. I arrived to pick him up today at lunch time (admitedly I was a minute or so late) and found him waiting for me on the path (still in school grounds), just a few feet away from his classroom. He was rather indignant that I wasn't there. I saw another mother who said she had been keeping an eye on him. I immediatly spoke to the teacher, explaining that I had only just arrived and where I found him. Their policy is to call the child's name and let them out of the class to the waiting parent. She seemed very surprised and seemed to be of the opinion that that he had somehow got out on his own. I believe she did apologise but I was rather shocked and so cannot clearly remembr her exact words. She then told ds that he mustn't go out without being called.
When I asked him about it afterwards he said he had gone out because his name had been called, and then he had been upset because he couldn't see me. I am rather believing his version as even if he had tried to go out of his own accord, surely the teacher (she stands at the door) should have stopped him.
I didn't make a big fuss at the time because I felt bad at cutting it so fine. But now wonder if I should say something again tomorrow.
Have of course told ds that even if he hears his name called he mustn't leave the class unless he can see me.

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carla · 15/09/2004 16:32

Unbl**dybelievable

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mckenzie · 15/09/2004 16:33

that's scary boomama.

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BooMama · 15/09/2004 16:40

Don't want to get off on a bad foot with the teacher but feel I may be an irresponsible parent if I don't follow this up in some way...

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pixiefish · 15/09/2004 17:47

FFS. Totally unbelievable and irresponsible teacher...............

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Titania · 15/09/2004 17:50

ive had this too...told ds to go back in of im late and not there when he gets out

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WideWebWitch · 15/09/2004 19:55

First of all (sorry, please don't hate me), I'd really, really, really try not to be late. I know it's easier said than done though. But I agree, she absolutely shouldn't have let him out without seeing you first. I'd leave it tbh, I don't think I'd bother saying anything but would just make sure I was there in future. At the little village school where ds went until a year ago though children were let out even if the parent wasn't there. They were expected to mill about in the playground. But it was the depths of the countryside.

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lou33 · 15/09/2004 19:57

Is there another child in the class with the same name, and he could have got confused?

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ladywallopofcod · 15/09/2004 20:00

I had this once with ds1 and he had blagged his way out! told her he could see me!

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jampot · 15/09/2004 20:12

this happened to me when ds was in year 1 (nqt - totally crap though) let ds out and he'd buggered off and hid behind a tree by the pond!!! she wasn't supposed to let them out without seeing a parent and hadn't got a clue where he was!!!

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roisin · 15/09/2004 20:14

It is very hard for teachers at this stage when they don't even know all the kids properly yet, let alone all the different adults who pick them up. But there are 30 children to get out of the classroom to 30 adults who are standing in the pouring rain, getting increasingly fed up and impatient because they need to get to a separate site in 5 mins to pick up another child ... Well maybe your school isn't like this, but ours is!

I agree it is a crucial lapse of safety, and I'm sure all teachers do take the safe dismissal of children very seriously. But if your ds thought his name was called, and headed out confidently, thinking he could see you ...

Anyway, personally I wouldn't raise it again with the teacher, I'm sure she's as shocked as you are and will be extra careful tomorrow. As a safety precaution though make sure your ds knows he should go straight back to the teacher on any day if he doesn't find you immediately.

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polly28 · 15/09/2004 23:06

I tend to agree with www,the fact that you mentioned it at the time was good.I'm sure the teacher will be extra vigilant tomorrow.I think teachers have such a hard job.If I was a teacher I'd be bloody hopeless.
She may have assumed the other mother was in some way responsible for your ds.
If it happens again I would definately speak to her ,,but use it as a good lesson for your ds stay in the class until he sees you.

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BooMama · 16/09/2004 10:42

I do agree with you, www - I felt awful about being late which was why I didn't make a fuss at the time.
Spoke to the other mother at the school this morning to see if she recalled ds's name being called - she said she hadn't heard it but also she hadn't heard her son's name and I think maybe they had come out together somehow.
I was a bit worried that the teacher had got confused and called out ds's name. I now think that ds must have thought he heard his name and got up to go (I am usually one of the first mums there and he is used to coming out quickly).
Still don't know how he got out of the door undetected but am not going to make a big fuss. I do think they have all the correct proceedures set up and am not unduly worried about the possibility of it happening again.
Thanks for your advice!

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