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New school

(5 Posts)
theirmum1234 Mon 26-Jun-17 16:20:59

Hi all I'm after a little advice, I've never posted however have read and been informed from feed back from others here and feel I need an objective opinion.
I'm a mum of four and have recently found out that my sons have been abused by another child a (older cousin) although I went to the police and social services as the perpetrator was two weeks before his 11th birthday he will not be criminalised.
This news has been a huge shock to my system and I'm sick of redefining the lines between "normal" childhood sexual exploration and abuse!!!
My dilemma lies in the fact that we the children and I have to see the perpetrator and his family every morning and afternoon as the children all attend the same school. Which for me is becoming more and more of a challenge, do I move them, and if so how easy is it to move schools????🙃😕😣😖

soapboxqueen Mon 26-Jun-17 17:41:37

It's very easy to move children to a new school. Just call up schools and ask if they have places.

If the school aren't excluding the other child, are they putting any other measures in place? Though understandably I can imagine the only measure you would accept would be exclusion. I suspect the best bet for your child would be to leave the whole situation behind.

theirmum1234 Mon 26-Jun-17 21:15:21

Thanks for replying, the school are under instruction from the social worker to keep the children separate, my children and I now enter and leave the main entrance it's seems so unfair that they have to change everything they do when they are the victims in all of thisangry

admission Mon 26-Jun-17 21:54:39

I totally think the school have got this wrong in the context of you and your children becoming the "guilty" party in making your children do something different from the norm. It should be the cousin who is doing the different processes.
Having said that, you say the older cousin is 11 and therefore I assume will be leaving the school in a matter of 4 weeks. As such I think that if you are happy with the school that you need to take the longer view that in a few weeks time there will not be the issue you have now. Getting into another school with 4 siblings will not be easy, though obviously any panel is going to have a great deal of sympathy for your situation.
I would look very seriously at how you can mitigate the issues at the school for the next few weeks. For instance can you not ask that the school / LA teach the cousin elsewhere till the end of term, that he comes out through the main entrance, that he is not allowed to be on his own whilst in school etc

theirmum1234 Mon 26-Jun-17 22:28:35

Thank you so much for your reply and suggestions, just to clarify I've four children however the eldest is 17 and doing a levels any the youngest is only 3mths. It's just the two in the middle (5 & 7) who attend the school. You're spot on the cousin is due to leave at the end of the academic year however his sibling still attends and we have to see the parents who tried to a) past it off as innocent child hood exploration the b) blame my 5year old so as you can imagine there has been a complete breakdown in our relationship.
What I do find so frustrating is that we have been instructed by social services to just "carry on as normal" so the school and the cousin are doing just that and I'm at my wits end message does this send to my children who have been violated!😢😥 it breaks my heart

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