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Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Education

Arguments for and against for the uninitiated HOME ED vs SCHOOL.......

27 replies

VeniVidiVickiQV · 17/10/2006 10:52

All things being equal..which do you think is better?

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WelshBoris · 17/10/2006 10:52

Will watch this with interest

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bluejelly · 17/10/2006 10:57

School

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 17/10/2006 10:58

Well thats no good to me

I want opinions ......

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 17/10/2006 10:58

sorry bluej - that was to WB - but, in any case - why do you think school over and above home ed?

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HumphreyComfreyCushion · 17/10/2006 11:03

In our case, home education undoubtedly works best.

My children are dyslexic, and the English state school system does not provide an appropriate education for dyslexic children.

In our case, it was actually damaging to them.

So, now they are home educated, and they are bright, intelligent, sociable (wait for the "but how can they socialise if they're not in school" comments ), and confident that being dyslexic will not stop them achieving whatever they want, as long as they work hard and are determined.

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HumphreyComfreyCushion · 17/10/2006 11:04

Oh, and NO SCHOOL RUN!

I rest my case.

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poppiesinaline · 17/10/2006 11:12

Personally I think school because education is not just about reading, writing and maths its about learning how to live along side other people who you wouldnt necessarily choose to be with and how to sort out problems with friends yourself etc etc.

Also, surely, if you teach your children yourself arent they just getting your views ? And also, everyone is good at some things and not others which is why I think its good to have teachers that teach different subjects. Not one person can be good at teaching all subjects surely??

A friend of mine home educates her children. She is a teacher herself by trade. She has decided it is not working for the children (feels they are missing out socially) and for the family (too exclusive, too inward looking, and too stressful ! ) and family life is suffering. They are starting full time school after half term. Interestingly the children can not wait.

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Flamebat · 17/10/2006 11:14

Pros and cons to both imo. For me, its gonna have to be school because as much as I love my DD, I tend to want to strangle her when we are alone together for too long

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poppiesinaline · 17/10/2006 11:16

I would just like to add that I do admire people who home educate because I couldnt be around my children (as much as I love them dearly) all the time. It would do my head in.

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HumphreyComfreyCushion · 17/10/2006 11:17

My home educated children are taught by lots of different people.

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Gobbledispook · 17/10/2006 11:17

Can't say one is better. Must depend on child and family circumstances surely?

For us, school. For 1001 reasons. School gives them so many things that I couldn't and they still get all of things from me that I can give them.

School run doesn't bother me - I like it. Except when it's raining!

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lucycat · 17/10/2006 11:20

This is interesting as I have been helping out in dd's school - she's in year 2 and i can see that she is 'stifled' a bit by school, the work isn't entirely appropriate as she's in a year 1/2 mixed class and she's the oldest in the class, she certainly isn't the same witty, curious dd that I see at home - and I feel it's such a shame. but could I have the patience and dedication to Home ed - i don't know - probably not.

I would love to send her to a small all girls independent school where she was cared for and stretched to do the things that interested her, but we can't afford it.

Much respect to Home edders

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emmatom · 17/10/2006 11:24

School - Apart from the lessons, the reasons being things like the summer plays, Christmas plays, assembly performances. The anticipation and sheer joy this seems to bring my two, what with learning their lines, who's playing what, the songs they sing.

'Outsiders' visiting. They had the local rugby team in last week, an author in today, a Roman soldier popped in a few months ago who had them enacting battles in the playground etc. etc.

Things like the run up to Christmas, Easter etc. Decorating the school, anticipating the Christmas Disco, carols in assembly, winding down for end of term. I'm wallowing in my own memories here, but my kids seem to enjoy what I did, so school is obviously the choice for us.

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Gobbledispook · 17/10/2006 11:25

Ditto emmatom - I absolutely adored school, loved every minute. I loved being part of the whole school 'community' so I guess that's what I'm wanting for my children. So far, so good - they love it!

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Veggiemummy · 17/10/2006 11:37

green parent this month have a whole section on alternative schooling and home schooling was one of them. was very interesting, they quoted a study that found that contrary to popular belief school taught children tend to be more anti social, less confident and less mature than home school or alternative schooled children.

i personally am considering home schooling or montessori school for my children as the current mainstream system only teaches in one way even though children may learn in four different ways depending on the child. Also as already said the current system doesn't account for children with Dylexia these children are seen as having a disability and while they may be given some extra help, the style of teaching is not catered to them they just have to fit in or they miss out.

also the way maths is taught in mainstream is not adequate, it mashes practical and theoretical together and doesnt allow for non written maths to develop properly (math done in your head). Don't even get me started on english.

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HumphreyComfreyCushion · 17/10/2006 11:37

I adored school too.

But then I'm not dyslexic, and I wasn't bullied, and I wasn't made to feel stupid and worthless.

All the nativities and the school plays and the visitors in the world can't compensate for that.

If my children adored school, they'd still be there.

If I felt that school was a safe and nurturing environment for my children, I'd even smile on the school run.

TBH, I don't feel like home education is really a choice for us. It's a necessity as we want our children to grow up with a sense of self-esteem and a love of learning.

Luckily we all love it - but if we didn't, would there suddenly be a local primary school with adequate learning support from a dyslexia trained teacher available?

It's not that simple for us.

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Gobbledispook · 17/10/2006 11:39

That's why I said earlier on I think it depends on individual circumstances humphrey. I totally agree - I had no issues either and sailed through school and that has to contribute to how I felt about it! My children don't have any 'special needs' or issues either so it works for us. I can imagine feeling quite differently if I felt they either weren't being catered for or were unhappy

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LunarSea · 17/10/2006 11:39

There's really no choice if you can't afford not to work.

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HumphreyComfreyCushion · 17/10/2006 11:39

I work from home.

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poppiesinaline · 17/10/2006 11:47

Humphrey - I think people have to do what they think is best for their kids. Your circumstances sound different from the norm. I think you are right, in your case, home education is the best option. I take my hat off to you. I think its takes one special person to be able to do it. I certainly couldnt.

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Flamebat · 17/10/2006 12:34

Humphrey - I think what you have said sums it all up for me. I enjoyed school, and at preschool DD is thriving, but I have always said (as strong as my strangling need is ) if it became clear that school wasn't what she needed, then I would home ed.

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juuule · 17/10/2006 13:08

Children who are home-educated also have drama groups for plays etc. They also arrange for outsiders to visit their group meetings. They have sports days, too. They can socialise with a wide range of people from all walks of life as well as different age ranges. They are not stuck with a peer group all fumbling together to make sense of societies rules. They can still take part in Scouts, Brownies and other out of school clubs. As regards academically they can move as fast/slow as they want or their ability allows and follow what interests them not what someone else says they should. They get more individual attention if they need it. They can learn about things without the pressure of testing. They don't have to cram for sats and learn to the test rather than learn because it's interesting. I'm sure there is much more and I don't put it as well as some.

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Blu · 17/10/2006 13:14

For me and my DS, school. Because it works better that he learns things away from me and 'brings them back'. Because in a 'close' relationship he is anxious about things that he doesn't feel confident he can do, but with the less personal atmosphere in a large group of peers he operates very happily. He will not attempt reading with me, he does it well with the slight distance and formality of his teacher and TA.

I can imagine very well particular circumstances in which i would think Home Ed was the better choice.

It's not which is 'better' - it's which is the better choice for you and your child.

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MarmaladeSun · 17/10/2006 16:39

I've just started Home Educating my children due to bullying which the school would not address.
I loved school...absolutely adored it. But it is only now, having seen my children relax and unwind, that I can see the damage done to them in terms of pressure, and self confidence.
Our local home ed group is putting on a Christmas production which the kids can take part in if they want. There is also bowling, swimming, museum trips, nature projects, conservation projects...Obviously it's not for everybody; luckily I love being around the kids and am in a position to alter my work pattern - I'm self employed so now work 2 or 3 evenings a week and possibly a weekend. But for anyone who needs that time apart it would be horrendous and school would definately be the best option. But people don't really realise how sociable the home ed life is. Incidentally, my daughter fully intends to have her GCSE's under her belt at 15, and a diploma by the time her 'peers' leave school!

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Blu · 17/10/2006 17:05

In my parallel fantasy life, DS is Home Ed'ed. We explore the world around us learning and assimilating as we go... but the school hols bring me down to earth with a bump! I would be awful at it - much too lax and chaotic - he would be bored - he thrives on a bigger group, we'd both be fat - we love cooking together, and his Specialist Subject would be MumsNet!

I have thought a bit about setting up a parents co-op of about 10 kids and trying to poach the best teacher at DS's school as their tutor, supplemented by specialist freelance tutors and some parent-run activities.