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Taking dd with us on tours of prep schools?

(16 Posts)
sweetieaddict Tue 18-Mar-14 20:38:28

What's the general consensus regarding this?

I'd like him to see the school, but I feel that an hour of walking from classroom to classroom will bore him. He'll be 4 when we go on the tours.

Would the HM expect us to bring him or leave him at home with granny? Any etiquette tips gratefully received.

phonebox Tue 18-Mar-14 20:40:42

Leave him at home. Usually prep schools offer a taster session after registration and before the offer is given (sometimes it forms part of the assessment procedure) - that's been my experience anyway

sweetieaddict Tue 18-Mar-14 20:43:42

Whoops - title should read 'ds' not dd.

Thanks phonebox. He'll have to sit assessment if we like them and register, but I'd rather he see the school before assessment day.

Any ideas how to get round that one, if we leave him at home for the tour?

Only1scoop Tue 18-Mar-14 20:47:48

Dd came with us at 2.5 and thoroughly enjoyed her tour <with a doll and buggy that HM found in Kinder for her to push around with us>.

We returned a couple of months later on our own.

phonebox Tue 18-Mar-14 20:50:21

Mm, if he accompanies you on tours, you'll have to weigh up how much you'll be able to concentrate on whatever the staff member is saying, as well as taking in the school atmosphere, as well as keeping DS entertained - that's a huge ask for even the best multi-tasker grin

Alternatively ask if you can do a tour by yourselves and ask if there's any opportunities for DS to take part in any prospective parents events, e.g. a stay and play session, or an open assembly, or another open day etc. depending on the school...some schools are very happy to accommodate several visits, others less so.

tiredandsadmum Tue 18-Mar-14 20:56:54

My ex and I are shortlisting, then DS can see the shortlist, but he is 8.

sweetieaddict Tue 18-Mar-14 21:08:19

Oh so difficult to decide, if he's an angel or a devil that day, it could swing the decision dependent on his behaviour!

I read on another thread that some HM's make a provisional decision based on parents, not child - is this really true? <madness>

Bowlersarm Tue 18-Mar-14 21:10:54

DH and I looked first. Discounted the ones we weren't so keen on. Took DSes to the two we were considering.

phonebox Tue 18-Mar-14 21:11:27

Most HTs have more contact with individual parents than with their children once they are pupils at the's unethical but I wouldn't be in the least surprised if they did.

slowcomputer Tue 18-Mar-14 21:16:29

I'd ask the school. For example, Channing and SHHS specify that the tours are child free whereas NLCS and Habs actively encourage them to come and have things arranged for them. If these are very selective schools then I wouldn't encourage a preference until you know how many offers you have - you don't want him to set his heart on a school that he doesn't get in to.

lalasmum17 Tue 18-Mar-14 21:52:47

Early 4 is still quite young. At later 4 you could probably explain things.
Is this a first school or are you moving him?

If first time school, and you mention "schools" I think I would dash about and check them all first as parents. At a later date I would short-list the options.

sweetieaddict Tue 18-Mar-14 22:27:26

It's a first school and highly selective. I've got about 4 I'm interested in, the others I've been put off mainly from reoccurring comments on here!

I think I'll ask the schools what they prefer.


derektheladyhamster Thu 20-Mar-14 16:33:31

I would tentatively agree with the comment re housemasters, but you'd have to be pretty pushy to put them off you grin

listsandbudgets Thu 20-Mar-14 21:43:54

I took DD to the school she is now at and they said they'd be happy for her to sit in on a class while I looked round. She loved it. The only problem came at the end when she clung to the door handle and refused to leave shouting "I don't want to go I love it here can I come back tomorrow". Thankfully they offered her a place and she still loves it probably more than she likes being at home grin

sweetieaddict Thu 20-Mar-14 22:20:00

derektheladyhamster Thu 20-Mar-14 16:33:31
I would tentatively agree with the comment re housemasters, but you'd have to be pretty pushy to put them off you grin.

Thanks for the heads up Derek, I'll have to majorly tone it down then, so he has a chance of getting in! <grin>

sweetieaddict Thu 20-Mar-14 22:21:08

that's good lists, I don't think they'll do that somehow..never heard of that one around here, but an excellent idea and a good way of them getting a really good idea of your DC's character.

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