I sold something (an unusual football shirt) yesterday that I charged £5 for postage. I know it's quite a lot for postage but I charged that because; 1. someone else selling the same thing was charging even more. 2. I want to post it 1st class as I know that with the backlog from the postal strikes 2nd class stuff is more likely to get lost. 3. I wanted to make a bit of money on the postage as I knew it probably wouldn't sell for a lot and it has some fond memories so wanted to make it worthwhile.
Anyway. The buyer has now emailed me saying that they don't need it to be sent 1st class and it won't cost that much to post so if I send them a new invoice for £2 postage they'll pay.
I thought it was forbidden to try to make more money by charging high postage. If you didn't want to sell the shirt for a low price you should have put a reserve on it On the other hand the person bidding knew about the high postage and should have contacted you before bidding to confirm that they didn't need first class postage. Bit tricky but I think you should reduce the postage. Sorry
Your reasons for charging the amount are a bit lame reason 1 - that seller may not sell if overcharging postage reason 2 - as long as you keep the proof of posting, it's not for you to worry about whether Royal Mail loses it but if you're that bothered, you'd have sent it recorded delivery as first or second class no more of likely to get lost than the other. reason 3 - you're not supposed to be charging postage to make money, that's the fun of ebay, seeing if you actually make any money or just break even!
That aside, you stated the postage on your ad so if the buyer has accepted the price, he shouldn't be trying to change the price now. If he thought it was too much beforehand, he should have contacted you prior to bidding to ask if dropping the postage to 2nd class was something you'd consider. Watch out for getting negative feedback about overcharging on postage rates for future sales!
have sent an mail saying it'll cost £2.20 to post 1st class (weighed it and checked on royal mail website) so will he pay £3.20 to cover costs. He suggested £1 more than what he thought it'd cost to start with so that sounds fair.
Also explained why I wanted to send it 1st class and told him he shouldn't really have bid but I could see his point about the cost.
I agree DebiTheScot that your buyer shouldn't have bid on it if he wasn't happy with the postage cost and think you've been more than fair with your subsequent e-mails to him. I know my dh has bid on items in the past and been a bit miffed when it arrived to see that the postage was half what he'd paid but he accepted that he agreed to buy it knowing what the seller was charging so put it down to one of those things. Your buyer is maybe also not taking into account the packaging because that's also included in the postage charges.