Seller rude / aggressive. I no longer want to buy the item...

[parentfailure]

... what happens now?

I have just recieved yet ANOTHER rude and aggressive e-mail from Seller. It has only been 3 days since the end of the auction.

I e-mailed immediately and asked how to pay and how to pick up and got an e-mail back saying pay via paypal and wouldn't discuss pick up (or even tell me the actual address of the item) until after payment cleared.

Then, children became ill, had to attend docs.. Didn't check my emails for approx. 24 hours and I've been bombarded with emails from the seller demanding payment. I replied to the last one, explaining the situation and asking again about pick up.

4 more emails later - STILL no address and more and more aggressive.

WHat happens if I simply say, sod it. I'm not buying it. I have 100% feedback and have never not completed a transaction before (almost 1000 feedbacks)

Thanks for any advice.

I will call ebay tomorrow, but it's eating me up now.

[fergoose]

you will get a non paying bidder strike if the seller opens a case against you. Just 1 won't affect your account. They obviously can't leave you a neg feedback, and if you don't respond to the case you are unable to leave any feedback.

your seller is silly to ask for paypal for a collection only item. You could pay, go and collect then file a claim for item not received and get your money back.

You should tell them all sensible sellers only accept cash for collection only items unless they want to risk losing their goods and their money!

[thisisyesterday]

well... i think you shoul just pay tbh.

you're both being silly. seller by being aggressive, and you by refusing to pay until they tell you something.

just pay for it, get the details and pick it up.

as a seller it's incredibly annoying when you get buyers who fanny about, don't pay, and generally string you along and then say they don't want it. esp as sellers can no longer leave neg feedback

not that that justifies this person's aggressiveness, but it could explain why they have set rules and are getting cross when you appear to not want to pay just for the hell of it

[fergoose]

I wouldn't feel comfortable going to pick up an item from an aggressive seller though to be honest.

What have they said in their emails to be aggressive?

[parentfailure]

Thankyou all for your comments. Much appreciated.

Thing is, it's quite expensive (couple of hundred quid) so I was surprised he was adament about paypal after the auction (auction listing states cash is OK - I have checked)

The thing that freaks me out is I don't know where I would be picking it up from. I will have my two kids with me and he (see, I'm calling him a 'he' because of the tone of his e-mails) but they are signed 'cathy'

When I e-mailed him to say that the children had been ill and I hadn't checked my emails, he emailed back imediately saying that it would have been quicker to paypal him the money than to send the (explaining) email and s/he didn't care about my children. Ended with 'FFS!'

I have written back and said I would pay cash and to provide delivery details. GOt an email back telling me to stop messing him about and send him the money.

Why would they be so adament about paypal when they will be liable for fees. And why no address... And why so aggressive after such a short space of time? The auction only ended on Friday!!

I don't want to go near this seller.

[parentfailure]

CAn they really not leave Neg feedback?
I thought they could if they filed a report against me?
I'm not bothered about that right now. I'm reasonably decided I'm not handing over the money.

[parentfailure]

FWIW, ALl emails through Ebay, so they will have a record... Not simply my word against his.

[RitaMorgan]

If the auction stated cash on collection and now s/he's insisting on paypal and is rude and aggressive then I wouldn't want to buy either.

Can you cancel it with Ebay on the grounds that you want to pay cash and the seller is refusing? You might have legitimate grounds to back out.

[fergoose]

No sellers can't leave a negative feedback - they haven't been able to for some years.

I think they sound quite nasty - I wouldn't want to buy from someone like that who is rude about my children to be honest!

I don't know why they would be so rude, is ridiculous really. They can't open a case until day 4 - it's not like this is weeks down the line.

[fergoose]

i would just tell them you don't want to go ahead as they are so aggressive and you don't feel safe picking up

Also tell them they are stupid accepting paypal for an item of that value which is collection only. They are leaving themselves wide open for a dishonest buyer.

[parentfailure]

Thanks. This is what is bugging me the most.

I've been getting e-mails from about an hour after the auction ended.

I mean, I've sold stuff in the past and never demanded an immediate payment... ESPECIALLY over a weekend.

[thisisyesterday]

hmm yes, on seeing your latest post I agree that i wouldn't want to collect from them either.

i would ignore them now and report to ebay for being aggressive.

you can do an online chat with someone from ebay actually... might be worth hunting that out and seeing what they say?

[items]

Don't do it. I had a very similar situation, not here in UK, and although my seller wasn't rude, insisted i pay before the pickup details. I did and yep never heard anything or got anything. Managed to get some money back only after getting my bank involved who fought on my behalf. Absolute nightmare. Doesn't at all mean most are like this but now my gut says, if it doesn't feel right, don't do it.
Oh and sellers cannot leave comments about buyers, only buyers about sellers. Good luck!

[picnicbasketcase]

Agree with fergoose - if all emails are through eBay, they can see how horrible and aggressive this person is. Contact eBay and explain that you feel threatened as you are a woman and would be alone picking up the item, you don't feel like you can go through with the sale, and that they have been completely unreasonable by refusing to tell you where to pick it from in the first place.

[RandomMess]

I would email back and say that it state you can pay cash in the auction but as they clearly don't want to accept cash you are happy to mutually withdraw from the sale as you're not happy to pay paypal when you don't know where you have to collect it from.

[glitch]

It does sound really dubious. What rating does the seller have?
I would do as Rita says above and back out on the grounds that you want to pay cash on collection.

[stripeybump]

Why are you not just paying? Their listing presumably said they should be paid by Paypal.

And spending a couple of hundred pounds on something without knowing where you need to collect it from is a bit weird IMO.

[thisisyesterday]

stripey, have you actually read the thread?

[picnicbasketcase]

The OP has said a few times that the listing said cash on collection was an option, stripeybump.

[parentfailure]

Stripey - I buy loads on Ebay. My bed and 3 piece came from ebay.

THe listing said 'collection only, Cash or paypal'

That's always been good enough in the past. When the auction ended, I contacted the seller and said 'please confirm collection address, possible dates and times and also that I will be bringing cash'

Since then, I have nothing but demands for a paypal payment and will only discuss delivery addy and possible pick up after that.

Sorry. My mind is made up.

[fergoose]

Just ignore the seller - if they open a case respond saying you wanted to pay but seller won't provide address/time

Make sure you leave appropriate feedback, and all of their emails make sure you report them to eBay (link at the bottom of each to report I think)

And don't reply to them any more.

[stripeybump]

Whoops missed that the listing said cash on collection was acceptable. In that case, yep sounds dodgy that they're now insisting on PayPal.

[fergoose]

If you did pay by paypal it isn't dodgy - you could easily get your money back if the item was not as expected and you decided not to go ahead with the purchase, but it is the sellers rudeness and unwillingness to communicate which is the worrying factor here I reckon.

[Teaandcakeplease]

Sounds like they're desperate for the money but with their aggressive e-mails I'd be worried. Definitely speak contact ebay about it as others have said.

[parentfailure]

thanks Stripey.

I cannot fathom why, though. I've always thought Paypal were pretty sure proof about siding with sellers. So, makes no sense.

[stripeybump]

PayPal side with the buyer ime