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Can't cope with the guilt.

(2 Posts)
ActualMermaid Fri 26-May-17 21:13:04

Sorry, I don't even know why I'm writing this. I don't know what advice I'm looking for. I think I just need someone to talk to.

My family are very close. I moved out of the family home a couple of years ago and now live about 30 minutes away.

My DSis still lives at home, she is my best friend as we are very close in age. She has been battling anorexia for about 2 years, but has suffered severe anxiety her whole life. She is hugely introverted and has refused to talk about her feelings. Despite the mental health nurse and psychiatrist visiting three times a day for mealtime support, she still struggles to open up but is getting better.

My mum had anorexia when my sis and I were children. I remember it well, but she has since made a recovery. She is now acting as full-time carer for my sis, who is getting worse and worse. They are both obviously miserable and not holding it together very well.

I feel guilty every day that I'm not at home helping, though I work 50 hours a week, can't drive, and have a young puppy to look after. I can think of nothing else but my sister. I feel like I am struggling myself, but then feel guiltier still because I am not the one who is ill. I just want to be able to support my sister and my mum more. Please tell me there is a light at the end of the tunnel. What can I do to help? I feel useless.

bexy229 Wed 07-Jun-17 08:57:50

Aw OP, this is a late reply so hopefully you'll see this! Of course you're going to feel some guilt at not being able to help your sister out but you do have your own life and you have no reason to feel guilty about living that life. Maybe just make extra effort for phone calls, texts etc? Just let your sister know you're there for her however that may be. Do some research for her and maybe buy her some books on helping her recovery? You sound like a lovely sister and daughter to care so much and feel so much guilt but like I said you can't put your life on hold, as hard as that sounds. As long as they know you're around and care flowers I hope that helps a tiny bit! X

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