I hope this is not insensitive to anyone who is trying and struggling to conceive. I truly understand the pain of infertility and the last thing I would want to do is hurt anyone. I would just like a space to write down all of my thoughts on something it's hard to talk about in real life.
DH and I have been through ICSI and had a freeze all cycle with 4 frozen embryos at grade 5AA. From there we had two FETs resulting in two successful pregnancies. It's unlikely we will have more children, 2DC is more than we ever thought we'd have and is our dream come true. That leaves us with two excellent quality embryos that are very much treasured by us.
As far as I can tell we have four options, discard them, donate them for treatment, donate them for research or donate them for training. To be honest none of these appeal much. The thought of discarding them is awful, as is the idea of them being disected and examined. That leaves donating them for treatment. The selfless part of me realises this could be a life changing act for an infertile couple like us who are desperate for a family. The selfish and uptight part of me can't deal with the thought of a child or children genetically the same as my own being out there. And being able to track us down at 18 and wonder why two of the embryos were raised as our children and one/two were not (I appreciate this is a bit crazy as they may not think that at all). I feel very protective and territorial over them! There's also my DH to think about, he is very unsure about donation.
I would be happy to donate my eggs although I'm not sure if I could as I had severe OHSS during the ICSI. That may be an alternative to feel I've 'given something back' but it still leaves us discarding our embryos.
Any thoughts, advice or experience? It goes without saying this is a massively emotional and sensitive subject which I'm trying to think very carefully about so please only thoughtful and respectful replies! Not along the 'they are a bunch of cells' lines. They have meaning to me.
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Unsure what to do with leftover embryos
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TooManyHappyMeals · 14/03/2018 15:18
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