I have filed for divorce, we have been together over 30years my first boyfriend. It has always been a life that consisted of good and bad days when he’s nice life is good but when he’s not it spoils everything, he’s always been very shouty but I suppose over the years the good bits outward the bad. I have no family for support and I think if I had I would have left years ago. I have our children who are all adults and even though they are supporting me, it’s not the same. I have never had parents there for me all my life and I know that being alone terrifies me as I felt totally alone as a child. I still love him, but also hate him for how he has treated me, how do you stop those feelings as I know they are not helping me. He has had an affair, always put me down used having no family against me saying no one loves you, controlled money, always wants to know who I’m speaking to what I’m saying I have walked on eggshells constantly but it’s like I don’t know how to be me, I know he will move on quickly why does my heart ache and why do I only keep holding on to the good bits
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Divorce/separation
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