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Is anyone waiting for no fault divorce to be introduced?

(19 Posts)
ProbablyFault Sun 14-Jun-20 20:20:27

Is anyone waiting for no fault divorce to be introduced?

I've started to look into getting divorced, and it's so daunting. I wonder whether I could wait for no fault divorce to be introduced to make it a bit easier. I could use the time to get everything sorted out a bit too.

OP’s posts: |
sometimeinthefuture Sun 14-Jun-20 22:04:45

Yes, I was waiting for it but I also have grounds for unreasonable behaviour. I head that they agreed it in the commons last week I think. I think it would be a lot quicker than going down the traditional route.

ProbablyFault Sun 14-Jun-20 22:23:28

Yes, I think so too.

Would it be so awful to accept being cited for unreasonable behaviour just to get it done quickly? Is it just a matter of you both knowing that, or does it go on public record somehow? It's so easy to get married; I had no idea it would be so difficult to get divorced.

OP’s posts: |
PrincessButtercuppp Sun 14-Jun-20 22:41:23

Slightly off topic but I'm fed up of all the people who are against it saying it should be hard to divorce and not made too easy....it should be hard to get married instead, so you know you really want it. Getting divorced is a total nightmare emotionally, financially, everything. Why not make potential newlyweds jump through a few legal hoops to prove they are compatible...a few very basic questions probably would have made many of us think twice!!

ProbablyFault Sun 14-Jun-20 23:15:54

😄 I think that happens in some religions / countries.

I don't actually think I regret ever doing it, but it would be nice to have gone into it with my eyes more open.

OP’s posts: |
Zisforstripyoss Mon 15-Jun-20 18:08:15

Yes me. Although I could go for unreasonable behaviour but it would make things difficult. I was planning on going down the 2 years seperated route as I just want to be on my own for a bit!

Somefantasticplace Fri 19-Jun-20 23:16:16

Yes I'm waiting and it looks like we'll all be waiting for a long time as apparently implementation won't be until autumn 2021.

Viviennemary Fri 19-Jun-20 23:21:16

I thought it was just two years to wait these days. Irretrievable breakdown of marriage. I thought unreasonable behaviour covers nearly everything.

madcatladyforever Fri 19-Jun-20 23:23:28

It's ridiculous it hasn't been implemented already and I hate the difficult to divorce argument, people will always get divorced no matter how hard it is.
Some people just separate and never get fivorced becuae of the cost I can think of two including my son's partner. Her husband left 10 years ago and they've never got divorced, I keep urging her to fill in the online forms as its been over 5 years because he could pop up and demand half her savings and pension at any time. They aren't even legally separated.

Makethemost1 Wed 15-Jul-20 17:37:09

It’s definitely on my mind. Been together 13 years and married for 11. But been struggling for several years, and last year were in couple’s counseling for about 6 months, although no actual progress was made. We haven’t really had a normal marriage for a long time, and no physical relationship for over 2 years. The problem is every time I try and talk about the problems we are having, he tells me he couldnt cope without me and breaks down. So I feel guilty and stop talking about it. It’s so mentally draining, and I think that the prospect of a fault divorce would just be impossible. I feel totally stuck but part of me wonders if no fault would make it at least seem a little less finger-pointing.

Makethemost1 Wed 15-Jul-20 17:38:51

Totally agree about the make it harder argument too - why make something that’s already awful even worse by making people jump through hoops when they divorce? Surely reducing the stigma would be a better thing for everyone involved, including the kids?!

ProbablyFault Wed 15-Jul-20 19:14:22

Autumn 2021 is still quite a long time away. I'm not sure what to do really. Does anyone else avoid talking about things, because it might just turn into a big conversation that you can't get out of?

OP’s posts: |
TheBusDriver Thu 16-Jul-20 10:21:19

At the end of the day why does it matter if somebody is cited for unreasonable behaviour? At the end of the day it means diddly squat.

If you're getting divorced you are getting divorced.

The only thing it does is gives people another excuse as to lack of responsibilty.

ValleysGirl72 Sat 29-Aug-20 19:30:22

I`ve been waiting for the no-fault divorce to be introduced. Autumn 2021 isn`t that far away now, although I do appreciate it`s still a long time for some people to wait.

I`m looking at this extra time to getting things in order and putting money aside for things like solicitors fees etc should I need them.

I think what is in my favour at the moment is that all my children have grown up, although they all still live at home. Children are aged 30, 26, and 17.

Lockdown hasn`t been easy for anyone I know, but having to spend the extra time with the H, has ust about cooked my swede! Some days I don`t want to go home from work!

We haven`t been intimate for years, at least 10 I would say, but that doesn`t bother me. It`s the little things that are getting to me such as not closing the sauce bottle properly and then it leaks everywhere, or the way he checks over his car after every time I use it, things like that.

There`s only one bathroom in our house but he takes forever to get ready in the mornings, knowing that I need to get ready for work and catch a bus to get there!

Sorry for droning on, but yes, I can`t wait for the no fault divorce to come in!!

Shunter350 Sun 30-Aug-20 14:38:14

Hi. I’m in a similar boat except I’m a 55 year old chap who’s 25 year marriage is failing. We literally don’t talk, it’s never been an ‘intimate’ relationship and the mental stress has just built up. I drag my feet going home from work..Our kids are 21 and 24. I’m curious, have you broken the news to your ‘kidults’? It’s my next major worry tbh.

FallingOffTheBed Sun 30-Aug-20 14:41:44

My best friend is a divorce lawyer and she is begging for no fault divorce to come in. The other routes just create acrimony and blame and no-one wins.

Marriages break up. It happens. Crack on and try and salvage somethihng in terms of peace.

Shunter350 Sun 30-Aug-20 17:15:10

As ridiculous as it sounds but does anyone have any tips on how to pay for a divorce lawyer?

FallingOffTheBed Sun 30-Aug-20 17:22:21

Call them and ask them how much it costs. There are different fees foir what you want to do. So the paperwork for a divorce may not cost much in itself. If you are asking for the lawyer to guide you through a financial settlement it may cost more.

Seriously- legal fees are alot less than people sometimes think. Call them. Say what you want. It is their bread and butter and divorce lawyers have to cater to the masses not just the rich.

My BFF works her arse off - is several years post qualification and earns less than a nurse or a teacher at a similar level. It is a myth that legal advice costs shedloads.

PeppaPigMakesMeGrrrrr Sun 30-Aug-20 17:26:01

I accepted the unreasonable behaviour my ex listed against me (not all of it true) to get the divorce through asap. It's not put down on public record anyway and, even if it was, what does it matter! I just wanted that decree absolute!

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