Going through a divorce from dh, at long last. We are trying to reach a settlement through mediation, not sure if it will be successful and the signs so far aren't good. But leaving the finances aside, dh wants to talk about access to the children.
The oldest is at uni, almost 20. She hasn't had any contact with him since Christmas. I think he tried to call her once or twice, but she didn't answer because she didn't want to speak to him. Now, I'm not saying that's good behaviour on her part or anything, but the truth is, she can't stand him.
Neither of the others, who are still at school, want to see him either. Indeed, the youngest one, almost 14, has to be cajoled into seeing him at all. She would be in tears at the prospect of an overnight stay at his house and I really wouldn't want to do that to her. I haven't even mentioned this proposal to her, because I think she would be so upset. (Stbxh has suggested weekly overnights for dd2 and dd3. I think in part to try to cut down any maintenance payable. He hinted as much. )
Anyway, wonder if anyone has any experience of this sort of situation? Or any advice?I know the obvious answer is to see a solicitor, but I have very little cash to pay. When I did see my solicitor a few weeks ago, he said he thought it unlikely that the children could be forced to see their father, given their ages. But at that point, I seriously didn't expect dh to be that bothered about seeing them anyway. He's never shown much interest in them before.
Dh seems to think I should somehow convince dd1 to see him regularly, and even stay with him, because "she listens to me". And he wants weekly overnights with two teenagers who would prefer to see him not at all, or certainly no more than 3-4 times per year.
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Divorce/separation
The children don't want to see stbxh - at all
21 replies
ThreeRandomWords · 25/02/2020 14:54
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