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Separataion advice

(3 Posts)
Xmarks Fri 21-Feb-20 16:46:01

So, here goes ....

I have finally come to the conclusion that my marriage of 21 years has run its course. No ones fault, no affairs, no unreasonable behaviour - we have just grown apart. I am sitting stbx down tomorrow to tell him we need to separate (which I'm dreading). But, what then?

We have 2 children together (18 year old at uni and 22 year old lives at home, but works). I pay the mortgage, all the bills, send my duaghter money, subsidise my son. He pays for food and holidays. I can't afford to move out and keep on paying the mortgage and bills etc. My daughter still needs a home when she is back from uni and my son has asked if he can come with me whatever I do. But how can I ask stbx to move out when it's his home too and me instigating the separation? But why should he stay in a 4 bed house on his own, that I am paying for (presumably I have to continue paying the mortgage and bills until the house is sold or I buy him out)?

Any help, advice or words of support would be very much appreciated!

OP’s posts: |
millymollymoomoo Fri 21-Feb-20 17:28:17

He doesn’t have to move out. It’s his home as much as yours so you may need to live together while you sort everything out

I hope it goes ok for tomorrow

PicaK Fri 21-Feb-20 18:55:49

I would take it one step at a time and just tell him you want to separate first. He needs time to process that.
Then you should look at finances and work out how you can start afresh on an equal footing. Eg in 2 similar size houses.

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