Can you talk to me about the 2/2/3 arrangement?

[NeverGuessWho]

H’s solicitor has suggested a 2/2/3 arrangement for the joint custody of our 3DCs.

I won’t accept a one week on, one week off arrangement, or a 3/4, so it seems the only way forward. Already I can see various pros & cons, but I’m really interested in hearing how this works, or doesn’t work for other families.

TIA

[LittleBrownBaby]

We do this. So mum,mum,dad,dad,mum,mum,mum and the switch dad,dad, mum,mum, dad, dad,dad.

We start on a Sunday night at 5pm switch over and that person has sun and mon nights and drops at school tues mornings. The next person has tues night - fri morning school drop of and then the first person has the weekend.

For us it works really well.

[youknowitmakessensedunnit]

The above has a drawback that parents have different weekday nights every week, which might be an issue for things such as hobbies.

You can also do a 2 2 5 5 arrangement like this every fortnight recurring:

week 1: mum mum dad dad mum mum mum
week 2: mum mum dad dad dad dad dad

This means there are fewer changeovers and consistent week days (with alternate long weekends)

[NeverGuessWho]

@LittleBrownBaby
Thank you. It’s good to hear that it can work well.

@youknowitmakessensedunnit
I think it will work better because it means it won’t always be the same parent juggling the hobbies. I think that’s a bonus. 😊

That’s the first time I’ve heard of the 2/2/5/5 arrangement. Do you have any experience of this?

[Tulipan]

How old are the children? Are they old enough to have input as well?
We do similar to the 2/2/5/5 so we have set weekdays then alternate the weekends but with a bit of flex depending on weekend commitments. It works well and kids like it

[youknowitmakessensedunnit]

Yes I do the 2 2 5 5 arrangement, works very well and our son is doing really well from it.

Depends which plan suits you and your ex the best - if you're happy to swap hobbies etc that's great, but for me personally with tension from the old relationship it's much easier to have fewer changeovers (while still frequent) and not have to worry about moving equipment and kit to ex's house

[Tulipan]

Sorry, I meant 2/2/3

[MrsC2018]

We have this arrangement and it works great. Particularly because we do the handovers at school so one parent drops off and the other picks up on the change over day. This means no clothes end up at the others house cause it's just school uniform. Plus we don't have to see each other unless there's something specific that needs to change house.

We have to be more mindful now that DS is in high school to make sure that the school books end up at the right house, but it's a minor inconvenience in the scheme of things. School holidays we are flexible around each other's leave requests but 8 years apart means we can be civil and put our son in the centre of decisions (most of the time!!)

[MrsC2018]

Sorry, we do 2,2,3

[NeverGuessWho]

Thanks everyone - it’s reassuring to read.