I have been married for 10 years and have 2 young children. Been with DH for 15 years.
I don’t know what to do. I’m not happy. I know that I don’t love my husband. I think I must have done at some point but I don’t remember. He cheated on me years ago and I think something stopped that day.
Our sex life is poor. We’re not emotionally close. He dislikes my family. I don’t go out of my way to see his family. He is short tempered and has recently been cruel to the children.
But he’s generally easy going. He doesn’t stop me from doing anything that I want to do. He’s very supportive of my career. He’s not mean financially. He’s very intelligent, which is important to me.
I don’t know what to do for the best. I recently had a crush at work and it awakened all these feelings that I didn’t know I could feel. Lust, tenderness, desire. I never told my crush how I felt but it made me think even harder about my marriage.
My reasons for not breaking up:
- I don’t want to hurt my children
- I don’t want to hurt DH
- I don’t want to lose 50% of my time with the children
- I would probably need to move areas to afford somewhere which could be difficult with schools and 50/50 access
- I’m scared that I’m just being ridiculous and having a midlife crisis.
- Why blow up my decent life for the chance of a more fulfilling relationship that may never happen
Does anyone have any experience of these fears and what did you do?