Hi all,
I’m not a mummy I want to point that out but this forum has so much support on this topic I hope I’m welcome.
I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck as my husband of almost 5 years and partner of 8 has just declared he doesn’t love me anymore.
We’ve had our fair share of ups and downs mostly based on his inability to just settle. He’s quite a flighty character. I accepted this though and dealt with all of those as part of who he was and the man I loved, so I’ve supported him throughout.
A few months ago he changed his stance towards me and became very distant. It all came to a head and he explained he wasn’t sure what was going on. We agreed to work through it and he mentioned going to see a councillor for his issues (citing some quite personal not couple specific issues).
However nothing changed and a few days ago it all came to a head again resulting in me asking him to leave as I couldn’t take being treat like a stranger in my own home anymore. We’ve exchanged a few messages since and the sentiment is he doesn’t know what changed but he just doesn’t feel the same and it’s over. There’s no OW involved I’m certain.
But now now just all over the place trying to accept that it’s over. Deal with the fact I still deeply love someone who just doesn’t feel the same. Accept that I have wasted so many years on a man who despite me supporting through so many things, wants to cut and run without even trying to work on things.
I’ve also since found out the councillor (who he saw only 2 days before the split) was actually a relationship councillor and not a councillor for his personal issues like he told me.
I just feel so betrayed, have no understanding of why my marriage has fallen apart but above all that I miss him so much. He’s the only adult relationship I’ve had and frankly I don’t really know how to start wiping away those memories and being by myself.
I also don’t want to start down this nasty divorce route, I’m quite a reactive character when I feel cornered or hurt?
How does anyone get past this and start again? This is a very lonely place to be.
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Divorce/separation
Completely lost. How did this happen?
25 replies
Notamummybutneedhelp · 22/11/2019 23:20
OP posts:
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