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What’s the easiest and cheapest way to divorce?

(6 Posts)
Strawberry72 Sun 20-Oct-19 13:55:20

Hi,

I can’t stand it anymore. I married to a man 10 years older than me (I’m 47) and we have 2 children in their teens. I am living elsewhere (for work) half of the week from next month but I’m hoping to move out altogether next year (once we’re mortgage free and the eldest has sat his exams).
I have nothing in common with him (apart from the children) and there is nothing in our marriage. No affection etc. I can’t stand him near me and stopped sex years ago!

I have become increasingly distressed over the last 2 years and this has resulted in my resigning from my job of many years. Unhappiness and perimenopause is causing lots to happen but I know I want out. I’m bored silly. It really isn’t worth carrying on with and I’m crying on a regular basis. Deeply unhappy. I’ve told him a few times but he acts like I haven’t said anything!!

My plan is to rent somewhere once I’ve paid the mortgage off (April 20) and then file for divorce. I would think he’d be reasonable and we could arrange things between us.

Is there an easy way to do it?

OP’s posts: |
Strawberry72 Sun 20-Oct-19 14:00:42

Oh. And...
I’m in a professional job with a good salary so don’t need his money. I’m also still attractive for my age (which also causes me grief as I sleep alone with no affection in my life - he never was affectionate)!!

OP’s posts: |
waterSpider Sun 20-Oct-19 20:43:42

3 bits to divorce.
1. Legalities of divorce, court fee of £550. Relatively easy to do if you are good at form filling. Need grounds. Can do it online.
www.gov.uk/divorce/file-for-divorce
2. Who looks after children? Where they live/visit.
3. Splitting the money.

(2) and (3) can be done by mutual agreement if you agree, or through mediation or solicitors (court, ultimately).

I did my own divorce this way. Takes time, and even if mutual do be prepared for emotional ups and downs!

Strawberry72 Tue 22-Oct-19 11:28:19

Thanks but I’m not sure what grounds I could say. I just am really unhappy! We have no sex life, nothing in common and I don’t want to live with him or be married to him anymore.

OP’s posts: |
waterSpider Tue 22-Oct-19 12:05:31

In which case you have 3 options for grounds.
1) "Unreasonable behaviour", which you can word in a 'both to blame' tone if that helps. Just like the things you mention -- no intimate life, no shared interests, don't love each other, spend time apart, etc.
2) Split and wait 2 years
3) Keep an eye on Parliament which should be passing a no-fault divorce law in the near future ! Cannot come soon enough.

Strawberry72 Tue 29-Oct-19 18:51:39

Thanks waterSpider! That is very helpful!

OP’s posts: |

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