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Seperated V Divorce advantages

(3 Posts)
cantbeatfreshsheets Sun 13-Oct-19 09:49:35

I seperated from my husband in May. I moved out with kids. I saw a solicitor recently and decided to go ahead with divorce proceedings. I think he would rather wait 18 months. To let things settle. Have the strength to progress. He is the high earner so would be paying ultimately through the money he gives me each month for the kids. It's a decent sum so I should be enough and my rent is covered by him. He's in the house and I'm on maternity leave still. Our monthly costs combined are very high and I'm worried about solicitor costs I must admit. I've started the ball rolling now. I'm wondering whether to proceed or halt things for now. I suppose what I'm asking is. Are there any advantages to pressing ahead now with this. My family think there is no good time to do it and I should continue. I on the other hand after looking after two small children majority of the time which as many if you know takes time and energy. I'm wondering if I should let things settle or crack on?

Any advice? Thanks 😊

OP’s posts: |
hairtoss Mon 14-Oct-19 19:48:24

My high earning husband spent our life savings while we were separated ... so I would crack on.
(He also had a baby and got engaged to someone too...but that bit I don't care about)
I would do it now before life gets more complicated- especially if he/you meet someone new.

stucknoue Mon 14-Oct-19 19:57:46

It depends on trust and where the power lies to a greater and lesser degree. All the savings are in my name (I don't pay tax) whereas he is a high earner. Unless we actually want to remarry there's lots of practical reasons not to bother divorcing eg part of my settlement is his pension which I will take as 25%, in the event of him dying, I would not get a penny if we divorce but I get the spouse portion if we are legally married. Big difference is we still like each other just not in love (met very young)

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