My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce/separation

'friends'

5 replies

Whoknows11 · 27/04/2019 19:43

Has anyone experienced the ow now being friends with people you used to be friends with?

I just can't get my head around it on many levels!

OP posts:
Report
BringMeAGinandTonic · 28/04/2019 03:50

Yes and this is a good question you've asked. I saw a complete shift in one friend because of this.

Report
NotBeingRobbed · 28/04/2019 09:17

The answer is those people are not friends - they were your ex’s friends. You don’t need them. This is where people show their true colours.

Report
NextChapter2019 · 28/04/2019 19:57

It's a painful realisation when you break up with someone how people you thought were your friends too (I.e friends you met through your ex and became close with) don't really have your back. I can kind of see the logic; they are actually your ex's friends and at the end of the day they probably just want to see him happy. They can't really kick up a fuss by saying they don't want to socialise with the OW if they still want to maintain a friendship with your ex. After all the OW didn't do anything wrong to them personally.

I think the lesson here is to of course be "friends" with your partner's circle of friends but to maintain and nurture your own true friendship group; those people who have been and will continue to be in your own close circle.

I'm dealing with this myself. My STBXH's friends (who I counted amongst my own friends) are not so much aiding with my ex (not at all in fact) but they are seeing him a lot post our separation and I haven't seen or even heard from a few of them. Maybe they don't know what to say. It's ok, it's just another hard part of separating your lives.

Be with your friends, the true friends you have will stand by you always x

Report
Whoknows11 · 28/04/2019 20:24

Oh no sorry I meant 'my' friends not my ex's friends!!

OP posts:
Report
Blossom5 · 29/04/2019 08:32

Thats just rubbish! Sorry to hear that... People try and be polite but dont realise how that may feel. They wont like her she is probably pushing her self on them. X

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.