My DH has decided after keeping me hanging on for months that he wants to be alone, he thinks.
He has gone out of his way to organise meet ups with various friends and family (that he usually doesn't bother to make the effort to see).
This is all so he is not at home with me. He works a lot of shifts and often leaves the house at 3am to go to work. He stopped sleeping in the marital bed in December firstly by claiming he was watching late night tv and fell asleep so got up and then went to work. Subsequently he simply 'did not want to sleep in that room'. I now know he has sometimes walked around the streets for hours on end just so he did not have to enter our home because I was there. I guess that once he saw our bedroom light switch on and then switch off he would be safe to assume I'd gone to bed. He's been buying bottles of lemonade and coke and multi packs of crisps cakes biscuits and keeping them down the side of his bed (the settee he sleeps on in lounge). He's existing on microwave meals that he either eats before I come home from work or after I've gone to bed. For weeks I've been asking what is going on here? He would always answer 'I don't know. I think I want to be alone, maybe'. Yesterday i asked him Have you decided? He said 'yeah i want to be on my own, i think'. So that's that. I have asked him to move out. I suspect he won't move out.
I thought perhaps he was going through some mental health stuff but he denies it. I have tried asking questions and also tried giving him space.
He part owns a property that his mum used to live in. It is now empty so he could move there temporarily.
Communication between us has broken down and has been awful for about 2 years. I have tried being busy myself, making friends at a sports club, giving him space and time to think. I've found not telling him stuff about my day, week, month ahead hard. He's shut down from me. I would love to sort it all out and put it behind us but I don not think he wants any of that so I'll have to accept the rejection and I have to move on now for my own sanity and mental health.
My world is falling apart. I am so upset and hurt and rejected. I have support of my family and female friends. I assume i'll recover from this over time
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Divorce/separation
DH leaving me
26 replies
fingernailsbitten · 21/02/2019 13:05
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