I am the resident parent, currently our 4 children (15,12, 10, 10) spend EOW and two days mid-week every other week with my ex DP. I've asked to discuss changing this and he's refused to even discuss. I have him two other options and he gave me a blanket no. I mentioned mediation and he also refused (of course he can't but doesn't seem to know that). Can I just change it to what best suits the kids and expect him to suck it up given his attitude?
The arrangements were made in Feb 18 before I knew he was moving to a town some 25 mins drive away. He moved out last April. He originally was going to rent somewhere a few streets away as we agreed it would be better for the kids and they could continue walking to school, seeing friends and doing activities nearby. He moved to the town instead because his new girlfriend lived there.
The setup sounded ok in theory but in reality we have no routine. They're with me Fri-Fri, with him Sat-Sun, me Mon-Tues, him Wed-Thurs then back to me. It's totally disruptive. Three of the kids have Aspergers and routine is critical for them but they find it hard to keep track of where they're going to be. Only two nights of the week can be regular as he insists on having a say over the other 5 despite being NRP. He's stopped taking our DD to art as it's incovenient to wait around. Often misses our son's drama for the same reason. Both were setup long before he left. They can't attend any after school activities wed/thurs/fri because he will say no. My daughter is in a play and he won't take her to the rehearsals - insists I give up my time and have all the kids 3 hours early instead.
But this is all because he lives so far away. He often doesn't bring them back with important stuff like school bags, pe Kit, library books, coats and then I have to wait another week for them. He makes no attempt to be in contact with any of them when they're not with him.
He is self-employed as am I. He has always had a very very flexible schedule work-wise and is often just working at home. So why should I respect his wishes when he's ignoring what is best for them.
Can I just do this? Could he take me to court about it? Am I being unreasonable?
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Divorce/separation
Can a resident parent change the contact days without consultation?
4 replies
accessorizequeen · 07/01/2019 22:36
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