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Divorce/separation

Happy Christmas...not!

3 replies

mumof3boy · 25/12/2018 20:20

So we are mid process, FDR got us nowhere apart from the judge seeming to be pointing in the direction of me and the boys staying in the house...final hearing likely to be April and EX is now going to apply for a child arrangements order for 50% custody.

Kids are 9, 8 & 5. He has incurable cancer with a life expectancy of approx 4 years.

Judge suggested custody of such nature may not be granted due to the age of the children, the number of handovers and also his medical condition would be brought up too.

Last night. Christmas Eve. He takes kids out for panto leaving at 11. Told me earlier in week be back late PM. Text in the afternoon home around 6. Then 8 then I demanded home by 9 or I would call police. Which I did and they couldn’t have given less of a shit excuse my language. He finally rolls in at 10.15 after having dragged them round 5 pubs and ignoring their requests to go home. Two younger ones have had sore throats all week and this was also ignored as he was too busy talking...livid doesn’t cover it.

Everyone says I can’t let this happen again and I shouldn’t let him have them tomorrow on Boxing Day but how is that physically possible????

OP posts:
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Palaver1 · 26/12/2018 07:13

Your answer lays in his condition incurable cancer,he is and will do what he wants as he wants .
You really are in a tricky place here.
If I didn’t know how inconsiderate this behaviour is I would say find a way to step back and choose your battles,save your energy.
So sorry that he chooses to waste precious time this way

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Weenurse · 26/12/2018 07:25

He has a limited life expectancy and it is all about him. In that he knows he has little time left to do things with them so they remember him with a smile.
So it sounds like he is trying to cram years worth of Christmas in to a few.
Again, he has limited time so it is all about him in a different way. He only has a few Christmases to go to the pub and see people and be sociable.
I agree, pick your battles. Try to get him to focus on his time with the children. Does he want them to remember the panto or all the pubs he dragged them to when they were tired and sick.
Try not to judge, it will be hard going

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Xenia · 26/12/2018 10:10

So there is no current child arrangements order? In that case when you say how can you stop him just lock the door and refuse to open it surely?

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