My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce/separation

In need of some honest opinions and advice !

4 replies

Lifehappens1991 · 02/10/2018 14:22

Hello,

Firstly thank u who takes the time to read this, I don’t have many people to confide in, where to start, well I am 27 yrs old mum to a 4 yo boy. Been with H since I was 21. Rocky relationship and most of it comes down to his cannabis use! Shockingly he thinks it’s ok to continue to smoke it daily. I find it immature and I’ve lost respect and love for the guy.
He is very suspicious of me and ANY men around me including my boss, work colleagues and friends, he has said many nasty words to me over the years an example of the treatment I receive: I was gifted a bottle of perfume for my sales in fragrance by my manager :) I felt very proud as I’d more than doubled my target! Took it home to tell H and he spat it out that I must have sucked my boss dick for a bottle of perfume! This is just one example! Why’s worse is that I believe he genuinely thinks I am having rampant sex with any man I see! It is shocking, but the more I’ve endured it the less I am effected by it.

I don’t go out - because it’s not worth the arguments
I don’t have many friends- because he doesn’t like or trust people!

All I have is me and my little boy, I’ve told my H last week that’s it done! I am over with him and I will no longer be with someone who thinks so little of me!

Now he sleeps on the sofa and hopefully he will move out.

Has any one ever been through a similar situation before? With jealous partners?

I am ultimately heartbroken because over the years it has had its very good moments. But I am trying to remind myself I deserve better and want to know that this kind of behaviour is not normal.

I would really appreciate any kind of response.

Thank u xx

OP posts:
Report
LouiseEmily30 · 02/10/2018 19:25

Hi, Lifehappens,

Im so sorry to hear the tough time you have had! You sound very lonely. Unfortunatly i haven't been in your situation but i juat wanted to let you know that i was thinking about you!

I hope you find happyness

Report
WeakAsIAm · 02/10/2018 19:39

Hey life, having been in your situation for much longer; now approaching 40 with 3 dc.
I can honestly say it doesn't get better, I'm afraid it never will.Sad
Sorry to bring the sledgehammer, I know it's hard but you have made ultimately the right decision you just need to stick to it.
The regret will come from the amount of years you sunk into what is ultimately a crap existence.
Good luck stay strong Thanks

Report
Lifehappens1991 · 02/10/2018 20:51

Weakasiam
This is what I have come to realise, I looked at myself in the mirror and couldn’t even recognise the person staring back at me, I was empty soulless and totally beaten down. I felt my life flash forward to 30 and then 40 and all I see is that I will be so withered and aged from a life with this man. I have to fight for more! We are given one life and as I’ve seen it flys by.
Do you have good friends who you can talk to ? Can I ask does ur H also use weed?
⭐️

OP posts:
Report
Lifehappens1991 · 02/10/2018 20:55

Thank u for your kind words very much appreciated.
It might sound strange but hearing from people in healthy relationships helps me to see and understand just how not normal and toxic my marriage is, which is what I need right now. I am lonely, but I’m also a tough cookie. Just need to keep going forward xx

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.