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The cycle begins again....how to minimise the impact

(3 Posts)
tweedlezee Thu 07-Jun-18 14:32:07

So my ex and I have been split for 5 years this year. It’s not been easy and I have navigated this far on intuited the glorious internet. My ex and I share care of our children 50/50. My ex has a son who is 2 with his new partner.
I have been aware of tensions in their home due to the change in my children’s behaviour when they return. I have never acted on any of their statements about the times they have spent with their Dad inspire of it sometimes being hard to not challenge him on the matters which are brought up.
Now though the information has changed, my son has expressed his distres at seeing his fathers partner pushed against the walls by her shoulders and my daughter has independently disclosed an incident in which a bottle of water over was poured by my ex into his partners head. They are hearing abusive exchanges as they lay in bed at night and his ex left the country with their child for a few weeks due to my ex’s behaviour.
I am loathed to get involved but I have an appointment with a solicitor to see if there is any legal route I can take. I do not want to cut him out, but I do feel reduced contact should be considered to minimise their exposure to his violent tendencies- I left because he was emotionally and on three occasions physically abusive. Does anyone have any experience with anything similar and can anyone advise on how I should approach my appointment with the solicitor? Thanks in advance xx

OP’s posts: |
Pixikitten0123 Thu 07-Jun-18 17:33:05

I’d go and get legal advice and also keep a diary of the children’s disclosures to you - I’m doing the same for a deadbeat dad. It’s not right the children are seeing/hearing those violent encounters - end of! Please also include their fears and feelings in your diary entries. I was told by my solicitor it was a good idea. Good luck 😊

dangermouseisace Fri 08-Jun-18 21:47:30

Exposing children to domestic abuse is harmful to the children. Your children are displaying that it has affected them. People’s kids have been taken away by Social Services because they are being exposed to domestic abuse.. I’d contact your local children’s social work team for advice. They may be able to support you with reducing or stopping contact.

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