Toddlers struggling with new arrangements...

[3kimple]

I have a 3.5years old and a 2 years old and going through a separation.
My husband has moved in to a 2 bed flat and has asked for 50/50 custody - I have agreed as he is a great father to the children, and it would hurt all parties if it was any other way.
We had our first few nights with the husband and it has been heartbreaking. They have screamed til they were sick; crying for me; shouting that it isn't their house and that it isn't fair ....
I don't know what to do .... do we stop overnight stays until they are a bit more settled? How do we adjust them to this new arrangement? Any advice at all would be much appreciated - all out hearts are breaking and I am at a loss to ease their pain.
TIA

[Whoknows11]

Yes definitely stop over nights and do everything gradually. Sounds so traumatic for all involved x

[OpalIridescence]

Sounds like you may have rushed to reach the end point by trying to be totally fair.

If your ex is a great dad he will understand that taking things slowly is the key.

Spending the day there playing and having input on their room without any pressure to sleep in it for a while etc.

I am going through this myself an I really sympathise. My children are 4 and 7 and have not spent a night away yet. They are still getting used to the situation and they need as much as possible to stay the same. Where their home is, where they sleep etc.

It must be so hard for all of you but think you need to talk to your husband and ensure that adult hearts are thought of after baby hearts in arrangements for a while yet.