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Divorce/separation

How did you feel when divorce was final?

29 replies

whatnextfred · 14/04/2018 20:00

I got my decree absolute yesterday. I was sad and thoughtful and got pissed.

Today I feel unburdened. Free. Lighter.

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TheQueenOfWands · 14/04/2018 20:02

Really fucking relieved.

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ferriswheel · 14/04/2018 20:06

Do you just get it through the post? How long between starting the divorce process and getting it finalised? Im 20 months in and nowhere near that.

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whatnextfred · 14/04/2018 20:14

About 12 months. We had finances agreed and exh admitted adultery. Solicitor emailed, got it in mail today

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littlepill · 14/04/2018 20:21

Today! There has to be some irony, in fact.

I was helping ex. His washing machine has broken. I was loading his dirty underpants in my machine when he asked if I had seen the decree absolute! My copy hasn’t arrived yet Grin

What this proves is that an incompetent husband is not made competent through divorce. GrinGrinGrin

I feel a tiny bit special somehow. Like gaining membership to a special club. And it’s quite cool we are still friends (loosely!)

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littlepill · 14/04/2018 20:22

Meant to add, took about 5 months but no quibbles and barely used the courts.

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whatnextfred · 14/04/2018 20:23

Congrats littlepill Smile

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littlepill · 14/04/2018 20:30

Thank you, whatnext Smile You too, congratulations! Smile

I feel lighter, too. And excited. Who knows what the future holds...?

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NoGoodAtHousework · 14/04/2018 20:43

Filed in September, received decree absolute first week of feb 😀

Did it all myself as no assets - just a house that I'm have TOE and remortgaging - feeling all grown up!

Feels weird actually being divorced after being separated for nearly 3 years.

Congrats everyone else that's through it!

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mrssapphirebright · 14/04/2018 21:34

I felt an enormously sense of relief and sadness all in one go. I felt empowered, relieved, vulnerable and to be honest shocked (Evan though I filed for divorce).

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ferriswheel · 14/04/2018 21:53

I loved being married and i loved being a wife. But divorce for me is the only option. He is a nasty bastard.

'A wedding ring is the smallest handcuff youll ever wear.'

Sound familiar?

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YoucancallmeVal · 15/04/2018 00:06

For me it felt like when I had paid off my student loan. I'd gone through years of shit and then you just get a letter through the post and it's done. I feel I should have had it accompanied by balloons and champagne, or at least a congratulatory something. As it is, mine just hit the doormat, I read it, put it somewhere and that's it done. (I also then got drunk. )

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PickAChew · 15/04/2018 00:07

Elated

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HabituallyOptimistic · 15/04/2018 00:08

I had a party planned and a new dress to wear - in reality I cancelled the party and cried for a week. Not because I missed him or anything but I was so exhausted and broken from what I'd been through as part of the divorce process.

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LadyB49 · 15/04/2018 00:12

Two years separation, then I filed for divorce. The divorce took about four months. It helped that i worked in the solicitors office 😀👍

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littlepill · 15/04/2018 09:24

I want to post this here for us to smile a bit: divorced

Sounds like we have all pulled through it really well! Smile

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littlepill · 15/04/2018 09:25

Whoops!
Here:

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Chasingsquirrels · 15/04/2018 09:28

I felt sad, despite by that point it was long over (years) and I was living with my new partner.

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whatnextfred · 15/04/2018 13:51

People keep asking if I am having a party... although I'm very relieved it's behind me I don't feel like it should be celebrated. And yes, it is sad

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deardinah · 20/04/2018 14:05

absolutely nothing - well except maybe glad that i didn't have to pay for it anymore

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QueenofSerene · 20/04/2018 14:08

Relieved for sure, there was a new sense of freedom and meant I could marry my now DH.

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starryeyed19 · 20/04/2018 14:12

Like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders

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GrandTheftWalrus · 23/04/2018 09:49

I felt relieved. And I also felt the same when DP got his last week.

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purplelass · 23/04/2018 10:02

Relieved
Free!
Exhausted...

Best thing I've done in a long long time Smile

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BitOutOfPractice · 23/04/2018 10:05

I didn't really feel anything. Just "oh!"

In fairness we had been separated for 10 years before we got divorced (just never got round to it / hated each other enough!) so it was a bit of an anti climax when it happened. We are still friends and had a collaborative divorce with just one solicitor. It coast £500

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HRTpatch · 23/04/2018 10:06

A bit underwhelmed. Don't know what I was expecting.....
Mine took 6 months so not drawn out. Never looked back.

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