I'll try keep this as short as possible. Basically my husband left in November for a teenager he had met 3 weeks before. We have a 3 year old and I was 7 months pregnant at the time. Ever since he has been extremely difficult, blamed me for everything, threatens me and has barely made any attempt with either of our children. He's not showed up for agreed days, goes weeks without seeing the kids, shows up stinking of drink from the night before and even missed the birth of our second daughter (he had moved his girlfriend in the week before and doesn't like her feeling uncomfortable by having any contact with me).
He's just back from a holiday and again didn't show up to see the girls. I have a lawyer and had wrote to him 2 weeks ago saying I wanted to have an agreement put in place for custody and finances. It was still my intention to to try and keep going with set days but I can't bare how upset my eldest gets when he doesn't show or get in touch.
My question is, would I be unreasonable if I stopped access until we went through lawyers? He said he isn't wasting his money and I should just allow access whenever he wants it but our 3 year old is not coping great with his lack of interest or consistency and every time I get her in a good place, he does something else to set her back. It's already difficult enough having a toddler and new born myself and I feel like he makes everything worse. I have to stress that I want him to have a relationship with the girls, my dad left when I was 3 and haven't had any involvement from him since and I want more for my daughters. The last 4 months have tried everything I can to enforce this but I don't know what else to do if he isn't interested. I just want him to be consistent and reliable.
Any help or advice would be great
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.
Divorce/separation
Lawyers for custody and finances
11 replies
timewilltell23 · 24/02/2018 13:06
OP posts:
serena5610 ·
03/03/2018 03:35
This reply has been deleted
Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.