Is this a fair financial settlement?

[anowlmostfoul]

My stbxh and I have been in mediation to decide the division of assets.

The only big assets are the house and stbxh's pension. House is worth £160 K but there is £24 K mortgage still to pay off. Stbxh's pension has a CETV of £100K.

I am low waged earning £8K. My earning capacity is limited due to ASD. He earns £23K. My 17 year old DD will stay with me.

Stbxh has offered that in return for him keeping the whole pension and me not claiming any financial support I can have 65% of the house equity when it is sold. I think that will be about £85K if the house sells ok.

I feel under a lot of pressure to agree to this. Do you think it's a fair deal? I have no solicitor to advise. Thanks 🙂

[Belindabelle]

Is your DD going onto higher/further education? What will £85k get you in terms of housing.

[Helpmeltb]

Assuming you start negotiating from 50/50, there's 136k in the house and 100k in his pension so 236k total. Half of that is 118k so I'd say his offer is low.

Agree with the previous poster to think about what you'd get housing wise.

[waterSpider]

'fairness' is in the eye of the beholder, but at first sight this looks at the low end for you.

Other relevant info - ages of you and husband, and time married. Is this his daughter, too? If his daughter, then child maintenance an option, separate from any support for you.

First, you should be thinking about how well you can house yourself and your daughter under this arrangement. And, secondarily, how he can be housed.

Second, since you should expect 50%+ of assets from a long marriage (if it is) I think you could be considering a share of the pension particularly as you may have limited options for retirement income OR a higher % of the equity. And maybe not an immediate sale, either ...

[RandomMess]

Definitely depends how long you have lived together, is it his DD etc. Potentially it sounds way too low tbh.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Both of you are low earners. His offer is probably on the low side, but you need proper advice.

He also has to be able to rehouse himself on his wage, which is below the national average.

[BewareOfDragons]

Do not accept that offer. It sounds very low. And you need money to live on when you retire; you won't be working!

You need to sit down with someone who can value the pension and what it would mean to you in future.

[anowlmostfoul]

Thanks for your replies. Yes he is the father of our DD. She is going to University in September. I also have a DS at uni.

We were married for 20 years.

The mediator said you can't compare the pension with the house because it's not a liquid asset.

He is 60. I am 49.

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

The mediator said you can't compare the pension with the house because it's not a liquid asset.

That is true to an extent.

He also at his age may be retiring soon so his income will drop dramatically.

[waterSpider]

Extra info tends to confirm that this is a low offer.

Pensions freedom since 2015 means that pension assets are somewhat closer to liquid assets than they were before, in some cases being like a savings account (not all public sector schemes, though).

When pensions are offset against other assets they are treated as lower than the CETV (often), but even so would likely to treated as equal to £60k or probably higher. Even taking a lowball number like £60k, that would mean his take from the available assets was about 108k compared to your 88k. A case for 50% isn't unreasonable.

I do fear that you are all going to be a lot poorer as a result of this divorce (absent new partners!) so I assume you have considered that this is what you want.

[anowlmostfoul]

He was acting like he was being really generous with this offer, I actually believed it at the mediation meeting, it was the way they spoke to me, but now I'm not so sure... 🙁

[RandomMess]

I think it also needs to be considered you are likely to house one or both DC for quite some time to come!!! He only needs a one bed but you need 2...

It does sound a low offer I can't see any justification for it not being 50:50 when you have DD to house imminent ly and he only has himself.

[WitchesHatRim]

only needs a one bed but you need 2...

Not If DD is going to stay with him. He will need a 2 too.

[Onlyoldontheoutside]

So you get approx£15k and in return he gets to keep £100k pension.No,go 50:50.
Do not get bullied into this.
I have just divorced and the full value of my NHS pension was used offset against his savings.The CTV value I think is counted as lower if you are going to claim half not if he is keeping it.
You really could do with a solicitor for this bit.

[WitchesHatRim]

So you get approx£15k and in return he gets to keep £100k pension.No,go 50:50.

No approx 85k. Not sure where you got 15k from.

[BewareOfDragons]

I think people are assuming that the £85k is 65% of the value of the equity in the house, not an extra 15% because of the way OP presented it.

[anowlmostfoul]

Yes, 65% of the house equity would be approximately £85, depending on how much our house sells for. Stbxh will keep 100% of the pension and 35% of the house equity.

[BewareOfDragons]

Then you definitely do not want to accept his 'offer' It's a very bad deal for you, and he surely knows that. Wanker.

[vilamoura2003]

I think most judges would want to see a pension sharing order with a marriage of this long 🤔 I would think 65% of the equity in the house with a 50/50 pension share sounds not far off with his higher earning capacity 👍

You will find lots of lawyers who will give you a free 30 minute consultation 👍