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Divorce/separation

Husband has left me.

10 replies

bootcampgirl29 · 18/02/2018 07:12

Devasted.
I have had a really difficult 6 moths.
My dad died and I lost my job, but to top it off my husband has left me. He says it’s becise I don’t look after my physical health, mental health, overweight, drink to much alcohol and he doesn’t trust me to change. He doesn’t want to be stuck with me in 10/20 years and me still be the same. I have bipolar and am 9 stone over weight largely due to medication and comfort eating/drinking. I’ve joined weight watchers and haven’t drank alcohol since New Year’s Eve. He says he doesn’t think I’ll be able to sustain it. 7 years ago he had an affair with my best friend. I’m not sure I’ve ever recovered from this despite going to relate. I’m scared of being on my own. I miss and love him. I want us and our girls to be a family. I don’t know how to move forward. Thanks in advance for any advice

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redfairy · 18/02/2018 07:44

I'm so sorry to hear this OP. No particular advice and you're probably in a state if shock right now so just take it a day at a time. You have been making some really positive changes after a challenging time so who the flip is he to say he doesn't trust you to sustain it. He's the untrustworthy one OP. I know you're feeling sad and wondering how you will manage on your own but honestly, losing him could be the best and biggest weight loss you'll make. Take care xx

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Emabrmsca · 18/02/2018 07:55

I'm so sorry op. 💐
You're better off without him, he's not helping you, he sounds like he puts you down.

Think of all of the things that will be better being single.

Sorry, I'm not very good at giving advice but didn't want to read and run.

Do things that make you happy, show him that you don't need him.
💐

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bootcampgirl29 · 18/02/2018 08:09

The handful of people I have told have all said I'm best rid of him. I just miss and love him so much.

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Layniboggs123 · 18/02/2018 08:43

Aww so sorry to hear this, my stbxh left for ow 6 months ago I sometimes still miss the family unit but I'd never have him back as life is so much better without him in every sense x it's still very raw for you but time is a healer xx big hugs xx

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Newblue2010 · 24/02/2018 14:45

Hope you are ok bootcampgirl; the same has happened to me out of the blue.
It is awful, he left me when I needed him to be there for me as I had the menopause and I had thyroid problems. I was exhausted but as he was full of energy just put me down over it.
Everyone keeps telling me that the only thing that heals this is time. I'm still in shock and I expect you are too.
Try to keep up the positive changes you have made but don't beat yourself up about them , look after you and remember he bailed when you needed him most so you could never trust him again.
I'm trying to think like this but it is hard to imagine the cold unkind voice of now compared to the loving man I remember, it is like a switch has been flipped in his head. Look after yourself and do what you cab to make yourself happy.