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needing advice about partner leaving

(6 Posts)
Cbutton Sun 21-Jan-18 17:00:07

hi there
im trying to do the right thing for my 18month year old son.
his mother has been depressed and unhappy for the last year. shes on antidepressants now and i tried to get her councilling but she only lasted two sessions

she went away for a long break but as soon as she left. she was in a new relationship and moved into another guys place 5 hours away.

she posts happy couple posts with her new lover and has cut off communication with all her family and friends.
she wants to have george for a week a month and expects me to bring him on the 5 hour journey in the car.
she choose a stranger off the internet with previous anger issues over being near or even with her son. i have no idea what i should do my heart tells me we can work something out that wont mess up george badly but my head says hes unsafe and shes acting nothing like a mother should act like.
her close friends and family dont even trust her with our son. what would you do??? got solicitors on friday

OP’s posts: |
Yettilegs11 Sun 21-Jan-18 17:07:18

Hi Cbutton

No, just no. If her new ‘partner’ has anger issues then I wouldn’t let my child see her if you are anyway unsure of his safety.

She chose to move 5 hours away so she should make the effort to see him no way should you be taking him to her. CF

Gather as much evidence as you can regarding this blokes anger issues and take it with you to the solicitor on Friday - go the CAB before your solicitors appointment so you have an idea of what the solicitor will ask you and what you will need to take.

I would bet money on their relationship not lasting.

I am so sorry this has happened to you.

Cbutton Sun 21-Jan-18 18:34:37

i cant help but feel sorry for her. her mental state isnt good i keep thinking in a month or a day she will realise what shes doing.
i actually do a video call with her each day so she can see him thats hard enough.
i agree though your suggestion about her coming down here to actually spend time with him

OP’s posts: |
Yettilegs11 Sun 21-Jan-18 19:00:25

I would suggest no visits until you get a solicitors advice. It may be worth, if she is mentally unstable, arranging visits through a contact centre.

Please don’t put her needs first. George must come first. It’s going to be hard for you.

Cbutton Mon 22-Jan-18 08:30:43

i have solicitors friday at least.
i deffinately want to make sure she tries councilling and goes doctors for help also

OP’s posts: |
Yettilegs11 Mon 22-Jan-18 12:54:27

I don’t think you will be able to insist on that to be honest.

It might be worth posting in relationships to get more people to respond and advise.

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