Hi, first post so bear with me!
Background - I've been with my husband for 8 years, we've been married for just over a year and have a 7 week old little boy.
Things have been strained for a while but I've put it down to him being stressed at work and the struggles that come with brand new first baby and a very very traumatic birth. On Christmas Day we had the whole family to ours as we'd normally be at my mum's but she has building work going on, so had a few words on xmas day - husband was miserable and nothing more than you'd expect with having a house full and a newborn. So anyway gets to late on the evening we're saying bye, made plans for a walk with family the next morning. Everyone leaves, we sit on sofa and I asked husband for a kiss and a cuddle as hasn't had one all day and he scoffed and said what's the point... so anyway I got upset by that and he started kicking off saying he hasn't been happy for months, I've stopped him doing everything (cos I wouldn't let him go to the pub on xmas morning and leave me with baby and dinner to cook!) and basically he then decided to tell me he doesn't love me any more and wants to leave... so he slept on the sofa that night, Boxing Day my mum took our little boy for a couple of hours so we could talk, nothing was resolved and I told him if he really wanted to go then he had to go and stay elsewhere cos it was too hard having him in the house so I stayed at mum's one night and he went to sisters another night and by a few days after I was really struggling with baby and I asked him to come and stay at home for at least a month til I was able to get in to a routine and manage better so all been going fine but I've felt we've opened up to each other and I started feeling we may in the future be able to resolve things... he's acknowledged that he's depressed and has agreed to go to GP. So this week he's been away for 2 days at his dad's wedding and I've had a full on meltdown, he's been all over social media looking like he's having the time of his life while I'm at home with a tiny baby really struggling. He's came home tonight and been nasty with me, for example says he might not go to GP tomorrow, I asked whether he told people we'd split up and he says no one asked where me or baby were so he didn't need to tell them. Saying I'm to blame for everything and no hope of reconciliation. Doesnt need me to care about his mental health. I'm on the verge of telling him to leave and I'll manage myself but I know I'll probably not cope and I'll end up having to ask my mum for a lot of help. I'm worried I'll push him too far when he's already in a hard place. I'm convinced that when he says he's been unhappy for months it's the depression he's been suffering with for months not unhappiness in our marriage cos we argue like anyone and yes probably more so when I've been pregnant but it's a very stressful time! As much as I hate what he's done and what he's putting me through I love him so much and I'm so concerned about him. Why I have no idea when he's being so awful! Should I make him leave? I think if he's here he'll get my support and time with his son and realise he should be at home with us but then if he's not sure he may realise what he's thrown away if he has some space from
It! Please someone help me to sort my head out, it's all overwhelming! xxx
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Divorce/separation
Husband leaving me and newborn!
31 replies
BJG19 · 05/01/2018 01:37
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