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Separated and don't know who I am!!

(4 Posts)
Philldient Sat 18-Nov-17 09:52:14

Don’t think the details are important as to why we separated, thought I will say it wasn’t my choice.

I’m trying to pick myself up from the separation but I feel like I’ve put soo much of myself into the marriage I’ve lost who I am as an individual. I don’t know what to do through the day when I’m not working, I find it hard to socialise I’ve not been in contact with my friend base really since I was married maybe even before. The relationship was EVERYTHING to me and I now think I was wrong to let myself get so attached to someone.. I really don’t know what to do! I have no hobbies.. I’m not a music person my interests are sporadic and I feel like a shell of a person that is still attached to the person I dreamed of being with until I die. /sigh

OP’s posts: |
myrtlehuckingfuge Sat 18-Nov-17 13:15:38

How long were you married for? Did you move away from your friends? Recently separated myself (3 months) and I am making plans- sailing club and sports based mainly. I too feel I lost my hobbies and interests during a 10 year relationship. Luckily for me I ramped up contact with friends towards the last year when I think I subconsciously knew he was checking out of the relationship.

Philldient Sat 18-Nov-17 13:31:31

6 years, we did move but it was because I had a new job. Financially it’s not great atm and the only word I can use to explain it is empty. Confidence is all time low and “having fun” seems impossible

OP’s posts: |
myrtlehuckingfuge Sat 18-Nov-17 14:27:11

What used to make you happy? I know some divorced mums who play netball. I do think that physical activity is the best way forward at the start though since it picks your mood up too. Gym? Run? Swim?
Do you work for a big firm? Do they have any social/leisure activities?

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