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Does anyone have experience of ex hiding assets when trying to agree financial settlement?

(12 Posts)
Goddamitt Sat 04-Nov-17 20:27:49

I'm about to restart my divorce. I had to halt it as I got made redundant. Bit of background. Ex was a serial cheat, 6 affairs that I know about over the 25 years we were together I ended it two years ago when the cheating finally was confirmed. Ex also earns a lot of money. It turns out he was hiding just how much even when we were still together (earns more than double than he told me) I gave up my career to stay at home with children and worked part-time. He was out of the house 16 hours a day so not around. Children are with me except every other weekend. He has a very lucrative final salary scheme pension and I never had one as it was agreed as his was better it was for both of us. This was taken out after we got together. I've seen a solicitor and will be entitled to spousal maintenance or greater share of assets due to disparity in our income and future earning potential. I've managed to keep things very amicable on the surface for the children. We still do things together with children as a family. He doesn't know I'm aware of all the financial things he's been hiding. Amongst other things he was paying around 40k a year into his pension. I was told by a friend recently that he told him whilst drunk he has a LOT of money in a hidden share account.

He wants to go through mediation. Obviously... I know the wheels are about to come off as it's where money is concerned. How do I go about finding out about the hidden assets?

To be clear. I'm not looking to take him to the cleaners. I just want a fair amount for me and the children to live on. And half of the assets we built up during our marriage. I've gone back to work full time so I'm doing my bit to support us financially.

outabout Sat 04-Nov-17 20:33:23

If you go for full financial disclosure then I think ALL the assets must be declared possibly with the risk of prison if found to be hiding it. Check with solicitors for real details.

Goddamitt Sat 04-Nov-17 20:37:39

Yes I've done that. I don't believe he will disclose it all though (friend told me he'd hidden the shares and unless I find them within 3 years I'll lose claim to them) so I wondered how I challenge it and if it's straightforward.

LittleWitch Sat 04-Nov-17 20:42:09

My barrister found a suspect transaction in XH’s so-called full disclosure which she brought to the attention of the judge. The judge was seriously unamused and gave XH two hours to get the rest of the papers brought to court, or else she was sending him down for contempt. She told him she wouldn’t hesitate to do it.
If you can find the merest sliver of evidence, then use it and force him into the open.

LesLavandes Sat 04-Nov-17 20:46:20

I am in a very complicated financial situation in my divorce proceedings. I have just employed Forensic accountants on advice of my barrister and solicitor. You should discuss this with your solicitor.

Goddamitt Sat 04-Nov-17 20:47:33

I was hoping to not get as far as court. I wanted to get it sorted before that became necessary. I'm clearly deluding myself aren't I?..

Goddamitt Sat 04-Nov-17 20:51:09

The problem is I'm not cash rich at the moment. Coming up with the funds to pay solicitors thousands up front is tricky. He's left me high and dry financially and I think he's counting on this to limit me.

jeaux90 Sun 05-Nov-17 10:40:40

Get your solicitor to threaten use of a forensic accountant and remind him of the consequence of non disclosure

My friend benefited hugely from using a forensic accountant though.

I wouldn't do mediation with such a sneaky fucker.

babybarrister Sun 05-Nov-17 13:44:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

roundthehorn Sun 05-Nov-17 14:04:09

We were a high net worth couple. What I did was to pick a figure that suited me, that would enable me to keep our lifestyle (me and my daughters') at an unchanged level after divorce. I knew it was much less than 50% of our assets, but it was enough for me. We haggled a little but at the end of the day I walked away with a sum that suited me and meant that I wouldn't need to be dependent on maintenance payments.

My xh likes to tell our children that I'm an idiot for settling so low, and that he is better in his business dealings than me, but my girls have seen the reality and I avoided a long drawn out divorce.

roundthehorn Sun 05-Nov-17 14:24:31

I had meant to say that forensic accountants are stupidly expensive and can take years to get questionable evidence, better to cut and run. In my experience it was better to let my xh think he had the upper hand. I capitulated on 15% of the figure I was originally looking at for a 7.5% "interest payment" to be paid annually on the shortfall for 10 years (as it would be counted as "Maintenance" and therefore not be eligible for taxation). He was surprised I wasn't pushing for cash and quickly agreed.
Look to your needs. See a financial planner. Don't expect him to be the man you married. I don't live in the UK anymore and so am not familiar with pensions. Good luck.

Goddamitt Tue 07-Nov-17 23:28:24

Sorry. Just coming back to this. I'm going to see what the financial disclosure shows up. I've had advice from a solicitor who thinks he shouldn't have been able to hide it as he wasn't expecting me to leave him. I'll see what it shows..

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