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wanted divorce, why do I feel sad 1 year on?

(3 Posts)
Crappyatnames Mon 30-Oct-17 21:13:56

Separated from ExDH last Dec. Were together 11 years. Was for the best, I’ve never been happier in general - no more emotional abuse, dealing with his issues and him treating me and his DD as if we didn’t exist, no more dread going home, I am free. He sees DD sometimes when it suits him. I have moved on, my new partner makes me very happy and is good for me and a delight to my DD. I do not love my EX anymore obviously, but sometimes I get a deep sadness that it’s over and it feels like he’s passed away or something. it’s taken a good 8 months for this feeling to come to light. Has the adrenaline worn off? We had good times years ago, I think I am mournings that person. I feel like I’ve lost a part of me sometimes, even though I’m happier now. Anyway, I’m very confused. Is this normal? I know I made the right decision but I’d like to hear your experiences. I also feel very sad that my DD is most likely going to be an only child, I can’t get rid of the sad feeling. I previously suffered from PND, maybe I need to see my doctor again as I do feel very down. Thank you for the vent!

dw64 Thu 02-Nov-17 09:09:21

Hi. I think those feelings are normal and they slowly fad. I am 2 years post W leaving me and no longer get those feelings. Im much happier and found a better person to be with. I was married for 28years and found out W was leading 2 lives for at least 10 years with at least 3 other men in that time. Mental and verbal abuse and yet I got those feeling.... I think its part of the healing Dont worry just enjoy the new life you have created

butterfly56 Fri 03-Nov-17 14:55:39

It took me a good few years to stop feeling that way, confused, sad, relieved, happy. Emotions all over the place.
I think emotional abuse plays havoc with the mind for a long time after especially if you have been subjected to it for years.
Hopefully your new partner will show you that not all men are the same.
flowers

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