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Child contact

(13 Posts)
Walkingdead11 Fri 20-Oct-17 11:40:37

My ex is currently not allowed physical contact with our daughter, a court ordered section 7 report is currently being done. He is allowed to phone her 2 days a week and send her a letter once a fortnight. Her first letter has arrived and it is addressed with only my ex's surname....my dd has a double barralled surname. Now I see this as a pathetic passive aggressive attempt to have a go at me by eliminating my part of her name (my ex is a narc). Do I address this through my solicitor or just ignore?

JediStoleMyBike Fri 20-Oct-17 12:11:51

Personally I would ignore. It'll probably annoy him more if you don't give him the satisfaction of a response.

abbsisspartacus Fri 20-Oct-17 12:12:25

Ignore it

XJerseyGirlX Fri 20-Oct-17 12:14:16

Of course you ignore it. You cant argue with stupid so don't wind yourself up trying to. You know why he did it

thecakefairy Fri 20-Oct-17 12:16:47

Yes, definitely ignore.
He would love it if he knew it had wound you up.

Walkingdead11 Fri 20-Oct-17 12:25:45

That was my initial reaction too but it still irks! But this is a man who has also said my the dominant genes in her body come from him and that her other genes (mine) are weak and deficient. He's obviously trying to take back control because currently I have it and narcs hate losing control.

DancingLedge Fri 20-Oct-17 12:28:30

If you ignore him, you retain control.
If you let his actions control your reaction, you're giving him control.

NightOfTheDeadXmasFairy Fri 20-Oct-17 12:34:18

You take control by ignoring him. He clearly wants a reaction, don’t let him get one.

Walkingdead11 Fri 20-Oct-17 18:39:26

Yes you're right, I'll ignore.

MrsBertBibby Sat 21-Oct-17 09:24:44

I would wait and see. And mention to CAFCASS. Especially if it continues. It is indeed petty and stupid, but names are pretty important to a child's sense of who they are, and messing with that shows a failure to prioritise child over hurty feelings.

Walkingdead11 Sat 21-Oct-17 10:23:52

MrsBertBibby

That's a good point, I will mention it to the Cafcass officer.

Walkingdead11 Sun 22-Oct-17 09:26:53

He's supposed to phone at 10.00am today but he decided to phone at 7.55am....3 times. I was asleep and didn't answer. I am now considering not allowing phone contact today, he's breaking rules again and causing me psychological hardship, it's all part of his game, so tired if it.

MrsBertBibby Sun 22-Oct-17 09:30:51

If he calls at the right time, answer.

Otherwise, ignore, and record with CAFCASS and solicitor.

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