Hello - I'm a newbie here. Have found some of these threads so helpful recently and desperately need some advice around my current situation...
Some background – I have recently started divorce proceedings against my controlling, manipulative, bullying husband. He is being very uncooperative – stalling the process as much as he can, playing the victim, taking the moral high ground accusing me of ruining my children’s life, treating me like I am committing a crime by wanting to get myself and my children out of this awful marriage. We are both still living in the family home with our 2 children. It is a horrible atmosphere which is unbearable and damaging for all of us but he refuses to move out despite being asked by myself and my solicitor. I can’t afford to move out myself and won’t go without my children.
I tried to have a sensible conversation with him today about divorce proceedings and about how we should tell the children. I was trying to find a way we can present a united front. He has no interest in this and made it clear he would blame me entirely for the break up if we spoke to them together. I feel like he is using this to bully and control me, to punish me for wanting to leave and most of all to sabotage my relationship with the children. He is planning to do far more than just be honest with them, he wants to put as much blame on me as possible, present himself in the best possible light and me in the worst.
What can I do about this?. It just seems so unfair. He is being so selfish and not thinking about their best interests. I am at such a disadvantage in this situation and no one seems to be able to help me. I have spoken to the helpline and to ROW – they are very sympathetic but can’t suggest anything.
I’d be really grateful for any advice. I can’t believe I have to risk my children being turned against me in order to get out of this situation. I feel like I am crumbling physically and mentally with the the stress of it.
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Divorce/separation
Looking for advice - husband using children as pawns
16 replies
ConfusedBiscuit · 01/10/2017 09:43
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