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How much contact?!

(14 Posts)
alittlepieceofme Tue 22-Aug-17 19:43:10

My oh walked out on us yesterday, I know he wants contact with our ds who is 8 months old but how much should he have?!

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alittlepieceofme Tue 22-Aug-17 19:46:54

Does 3 hours a week sound ok because I'm still breastfeeding?

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mumofone234 Tue 22-Aug-17 19:47:02

Ideally, as much as he wants (as long as its practical for you). I know it must be very hard for you, but it's your relationship that's over, not his relationship with his child. Poor you though!

mumofone234 Tue 22-Aug-17 19:47:57

And when I say as much as he wants, I mean that with him coming to you - not taking your child away.

alittlepieceofme Tue 22-Aug-17 19:49:18

Having visitation in the house you mean?

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alittlepieceofme Tue 22-Aug-17 19:49:59

He's a good dad, I won't deny that but he's destroyed our lovely little family!

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mumofone234 Tue 22-Aug-17 19:52:09

It's horrendous - I can't imagine how you must feel. Do you feel able to still co-parent at your house or his, spending time together, or are you going to struggle being together?

alittlepieceofme Tue 22-Aug-17 19:53:11

I really don't know at the moment, I'm heartbroken! He's not the person I thought he was! sad

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mumofone234 Tue 22-Aug-17 20:08:47

Ultimately it'll be so much better for DS if you're able to get along and spend some time together - and better for both of you because you'll get to have more time with him while he's so young (rather than missing him while he's with the other). Totally see where you're coming from regarding the breastfeeding though. It's not an easy situation.

MrsBertBibby Tue 22-Aug-17 21:47:56

First of all, you don't need to decide anything yet. Take a few days to process. He can wait a few days.

alittlepieceofme Wed 23-Aug-17 06:27:37

He said he'll give me space. Do you think it's worth getting a solicitor involved? Mainly because exon now lives with his sister who looked to party (not the best environment for a baby) and also ex doesn't contribute financially towards ds at all! Never has, he's self employed and at the moment the company isn't making much profit, I've paid for all household bills for the last 3 and half years!

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MrsBertBibby Wed 23-Aug-17 07:50:55

Yes definitely see a solicitor.

mumofone234 Wed 23-Aug-17 09:43:30

Yes you definitely need to get the money side of things sorted.

alittlepieceofme Wed 23-Aug-17 20:19:31

My sisters friend works in family law so spoke to her today. Feel better for it! I've told ex he needs to start paying and I want a lump sum for all the time he lived in my house for free! His parents are loaded so I'm sure they'll bail him out!

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