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How can I get prepared?

(6 Posts)
plotmissinginaction Thu 29-Jun-17 10:34:40

My marriage has routinely going through periods of all being well into periods of it being absolutely awful with him name calling, bullying etc. All is well just now but I know from past experience it won't last and I want to get myself organised. I don't know where to start. I am financially dependent on him. Two kids. What paperwork should I start to pull together, stuff on the finances I am guessing? I am afraid of being left in trouble. He's not from the UK, he could easily disappear if he wanted to. I don't think he would but you never know. How can I protect myself, my kids? I've sent an email CAB, what else can I do?

plasticcheese Thu 29-Jun-17 12:27:15

My first thought was to get your childrens passports out of the house if you think he might take them out of the country. Make copies of bank statements and any other finances, have at look at www.entitledto.co.uk to see what benefits you could claim. Good luck.

plotmissinginaction Thu 29-Jun-17 12:53:44

I hadn't even thought of that thank you. Again I don't think he would but then he's done a lot of things I've never thought he would so there you go. I'll start making copies of things. I am so afraid of not managing money wise without him. If I had the money I would have left years ago.

Viking64 Thu 29-Jun-17 13:06:56

Don't ever think you know someone mate my wife is now a complete stranger to me after saying there is more to life than marriage always prepare for worst case scenario and you'll be ready

Hudhud31 Mon 03-Jul-17 22:57:43

Save save save! Since he is the money person try taking little bits of money at a time and saving it. The best thing you should do is save up enough money to get yourself a place to live once you leave. So find out how many bedrooms you need and save 6weeks and another 4weeks deposit then you can claim housing benefit for the rent. Unless your in danger slowly get yourself out of there but making sure you will be good after xxxxx

plotmissinginaction Thu 06-Jul-17 16:40:51

Thanks, I hadn't thought of that. I was hoping to find a way to stay in the house with the kids but perhaps I am being unrealistic. We do have three properties however and my name is on all the paperwork. In my head I was thinking he can have the other two if I can keep the one I am in. Of course I am not sure I can afford to stay in it, that's another issue that needs resolved. I've started to pick up little bits and pieces of freelance work, if I can get something a bit more steady maybe I can do it. At the moment I can't even get to the CAB because the kids are off school and I have no one to watch them so I can go. I think going slow is good advice though, I want to make sure I know what I am doing.

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