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Nonpayment of school fees

(21 Posts)
OhMy2017 Mon 29-May-17 06:16:58

Ex has never paid school fees. He can afford them. Should he then expect to be involved with what DC is doing at school and what is going on? Would a school refuse to give information based on the fact that one parent is refusing to pay?

What can be done about nonpayment? I am concerned that the legal system may not be of the view that DC should attend such a school. Do I just keep quiet and pay?

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StealthPolarBear Mon 29-May-17 06:24:04

What do you mean about the legal system?

Only1scoop Mon 29-May-17 06:35:55

Whoever is listed as responsible for fee's pays. If this changes you need to inform school. Was the school fees mentioned in divorce settlement?

OhMy2017 Mon 29-May-17 06:36:09

I guess if one went to court

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OhMy2017 Mon 29-May-17 06:36:43

Only1, we do not have such a list...

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StealthPolarBear Mon 29-May-17 06:54:30

But it won't go to court if you pay.
Or do you mean if you both refuse to pay the court might say dc should leave the school?

SleightOfHand Mon 29-May-17 06:57:36

I doubt the school would refuse to communicate with either parent.

StealthPolarBear Mon 29-May-17 06:59:21

Op it's a bit cryptic, would you mind giving us more info?

SaltyMyDear Mon 29-May-17 07:00:07

The legal system has no view on which school your child should attend.

If fees are paid and you're both happy with them attending the school, then there is no problem.

StealthPolarBear Mon 29-May-17 07:00:40

Op why have you started another identical thread?

MrTumblesbitch Mon 29-May-17 07:01:13

My school says in the event of none payment, both parents are equally liable (even if grandparents pay!) and you need to sign a form when you join to say you agree with this. Have you done similar?

If he's refusing to pay and you want your dc to remain, I think the only recourse is to pay yourself or remove them. Beyond child maintenance I don't think he has any legal requirement for him to do so.

In terms of school disclosing things to him, I don't think they would / could refuse, assuming he has parental responsibility?

peukpokicuzo Mon 29-May-17 07:04:46

You are clearly, and understandably, still hurting from the end of your relationship but it isn't appropriate to try to keep your ex out of important aspects of your DC's lives to punish him for this. The contact and involvement between your DCs and your Ex is for their sake and their future mental wellbeing, not a benefit he is receiving that you can interfere with to express your resentment and anger. Your ex should be involved in and kept informed about your DC's education. The financial contribution he makes is important and he should pay what he can. If there is any possibility that he is hiding income then obviously you need to do everything you can to make him pay but don't withold contact in retaliation for non payment. If he genuinely can't afford it then yabvu - being insufficiently wealthy to afford school fees is not a crime and should not result in reduced involvement with one's kids.

OhMy2017 Mon 29-May-17 07:20:11

Thank you so much. He earns several times my salary and it is this that is the most frustrating.

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babybarrister Tue 30-May-17 21:14:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OhMy2017 Wed 31-May-17 13:07:46

Thank you all.

Thank you so much baby barrister. We don't have an order and we have both signed.

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Maryolwen123 Wed 31-May-17 14:44:27

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CherryMintVanilla Wed 31-May-17 15:26:03

If you can afford to DC to private school and want to, then continue. No court will tell you that they must attend the local comp.

But their DF should be contributing financially anyway. Isn't he? Get some advice on that. And then you can use the money for your DCs benefit, including education.

If it's the case that he has tied his money up in such a way that you can't access it - and do find that out for yourself instead of taking his word for it! - could you call his bluff and say you can't afford private school anymore? Might he step up then?

babybarrister Wed 31-May-17 15:28:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OhMy2017 Wed 31-May-17 15:45:17

Thank you.

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donners312 Fri 02-Jun-17 10:02:35

I had exactly this. Both me and ex signed the contract with the school.

He then said he would not pay the school fees.

School said either i pay all the school fee's or remove DC from the school.

I asked if the school would take us to court (hoping that may make Ex pay up) but they said no. Easier for them to ask DC to leave instead.

Now ex does not pay fee's i do and school have given me a bursary to assist for a year. Its been horrendous!!

My ex earnt a six figure tax free salary but now refuses to work so he doesn't have to pay maintenance.

OhMy2017 Mon 05-Jun-17 22:39:45

Thank you donners.... sickening what lengths exs go to...

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