Hi all- thought I'd chance my arm and get involved.
My DP is going through a divorce, and is trying to sort out contact arrangements with their mum. Seeing how the 'negotiations' have progressed (ie not very far, a year on- he still gets the bare minimum), has got me thinking about how 2 people can see a set of facts so differently.
For example, when DP finally took the step of going to a solicitor to sort out seeing them more often, he was accused of 'threatening' her. When he called time on mediation because she was obviously not in the right frame of mind for it, she said he was being 'controlling'. When he questioned whether the DS should be starting new after school clubs that clash with his weekends, he was said to be 'ridiculous'- that the children 'shouldn't have to change anything' because of what was going on between the two of them. From his point of view they are going to have to change some (relatively minor) things like that, so they don't have to change big things like how often they see their dad.
I've read these kinds of words and phrases on here quite a lot from my recent lurking, and I wonder- how confident are you in your point of view of a separation and all that comes with it? Do you ever question whether you're doing the right thing by the DCs? Can we ever really know who's in the right?
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Divorce/separation
Such different perspectives!
5 replies
sothisisnew · 23/05/2017 12:00
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