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Divorce - v - Separation Indefinitely

(7 Posts)
Harvestmoonsobig Wed 19-Apr-17 17:04:56

DP/STBXH? We separated officially in October, I moved and was bought out of the family home. 2DDs teenagers live with me.

ExP stated in an official that divorce was a reality and that was 8 months ago. I've told him on two occasions to get on with it because I do not want to divorce him. This break was good for the family. I am working on my stuff.

However, I feel I'm living in a fool's paradise and it would assertive of me to initiate proceedings, but don't want to; it feels too final and too sad - and way too assertive.

In this state of flux I wonder what the benefit would be.

WWYD and why? Thanks

Minime85 Wed 19-Apr-17 19:25:19

Get divorced or you are linked to him in life and if either of you die. It is the only legal way to get it ended.

Hermonie2016 Wed 19-Apr-17 19:55:34

Have the finances been agreed? Unless you feel reconciliation is possible there is not much point waiting.You could wait 2 years and divorce but potentially finances will be looked at then for fairness and could change.

The downside is that you are still legally married which means if you we're ill he is your next of kin.If you won the lottery he could have a claim..but that go both ways.

Not sure how many people wait 2 years but it is possible especially if it's amicable.A risk could be he or you move on to a new partner and that changes the dynamic.

Harvestmoonsobig Wed 19-Apr-17 20:05:40

Thanks. Time to move on or risk being a door mat

Hermonie2016 Thu 20-Apr-17 16:54:04

Another thread posted today is from someone who's ex agreed finances but now feels he was too generous.As it's not signed off the finances could be reopened so that is always a risk.

Harvestmoonsobig Thu 20-Apr-17 20:18:27

Good point

Harvestmoonsobig Fri 21-Apr-17 16:03:12

Up-date : initiated divorce proceeding

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